Endlessly.

Leap year.

2012-02-29T20:42:00.007+08:00

Happy 29th of Feb! (:

Ok actually idek why I'm posting this I just thought that it's a special day & i don't wna miss it.
It's a really rare day, once in 4 years like wow.
Happy birthday to those born today! (:

Work today was fantastic, met lovely & friendly peeps at work.
Ever so thankful for them.
Nicholas, Dean, Peixuan, Jack & Yewheng popped by my workplace & i was really super shocked!
Random people, they made my day tho haha!!

Oh yes & i've finally received my NP Enrollment Package!!!
One month plus till school starts!!!!
Plus all the camps & events that NP has organised for us!!!!!

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so much left unsaid.

Bird Park with Merilyn! (:

2012-02-28T20:13:00.001+08:00

Yup, went to Jurong Bird Park w Merilyn today!!!! (:
Saw many interesting birds, so awed by the fact that there are so many species of birds!!!!
Like wow can you imagine.

Anw I will edit this post w pictures once Merilyn uploads em! (:

Btw I hate owls, they scared me today when I saw them in the observatory.
I hate their eyes, creepy shiz.

The water's rough, but this love is ours.

2012-02-26T21:12:00.002+08:00

Went to swim with my dears Quah, Kityarn & Amanda @ CCK Swimming Complex!
Played by the lazy river & the slides for a bit before swimming laps.
I cut my foot while sliding down the huge slide booz.
Swam for 2 laps & i was panting like mad! My stamina has gone down the toilet bowl.
Swam a total of like 5 laps then we decided to wait for the waves by the wave pool haha!

Idk why the waves came then after that we just sat there to like lepak.
Soooooo lazy to move!
Anyway they were talking about their JC lives & I'm there sitting like some awkward giraffe. ):
Amanda was kinda regretting going JC oh goodness this woman forever.. tsk ah haha!

Sat for a while so went to wash up.
We all went "whooooo cold cold cold faster!!!!" when we were struggling to open the lockers HAHA.
Washed up then ate some nomz at the complex.
Talked & shared their eyecandies, sighz times like these that made me regret going poly.

Left to meet Jingwen, Zoe & Yingying for lunch!!
Can't tell how much I reallyreally miss being around these girls, it's so nice to see them all again & spend time w 'em.

Parted, cuz Kityarn, Amanda & Jingwen had to leave so yeh left the 4 of us!
Went to do some paperwork for PAssion card then headed to Zoe's house!
They were supposed to be studying but ended up stalking peeps.

HAHAHA.
Left a around 4+ cuz Zoe was falling ill, get well soon dear. ):

Time seems to fly so fast when you're having fun. Haha cliche phrase but so true.
No pictures today cuz, well didn't think of it.
Now when we part we say "Byeeeeee, see you soon! For ice cream or sth kay."
& it's no longer just a simple bye knowing we'll see each other in school the next day.
sigh.

-------------------------------------------------------------

Was looking at my past photos & I chanced upon 410's Class photo!
& I miss them sigh.

Sigh hope 410 can have an outing during march hols. ):

Ok I seem to be missing a lot of people but that's cuz I haven't met my new friends yet yah?
Speaking of which, WHY CAN'T POLY LIKE START SOON?
& yes i abhor the adult fare for poly kids.

So don't you worry your pretty little mind.

2012-02-24T21:42:00.002+08:00

Went to sleepover @ Merilyn's house from 16th to 17th.
Am ever so glad for this girl in my life whom I can pour all my unhappiness out to.
Went downstairs to sit by the poolside.
Talked a lot, told her everything that's been on my mind but I haven't got the chance to let it out.
I cried like mad eh, I thought I was over it but sigh.
That silly girl cried along with me, love her so much.

Talked until around 10pm then headed back to her house.
Settled down for a bit, bathed and all then we starting painting our nailz at like 1am..? HAHA.

(Photo credits to Merilyn!)

I have small nails. ):
Anw Merilyn painted rainbow nails but the yellow kept screwing up!!!
But this is what it looks like after touching up the next day. (:

Finished around 3am & it's almost time to crash!!!

I brought the pink giraffe bff got for me for my birthday. It was such a cutie Merilyn & her family loved it too hehe.

Old Nanhua tee!!!! (:

Yellow tee like waowz.

Crashed after brushing teeth & all. Woke up at like 12pm the next day lol!!!
Had a great brunch then headed down to shoot some hoops.
Came back to camwhore a lil~

This so glam.

Tried smiling without revealing my teeth & yup.. I think I should stick to my normal smile.

Was supposed to leave around 4pm to go NAFA but sigh last minute cancellations cuz laoshi had to attend some concert.
Disappointed max cuz we wanted to surprise Yuling they all.
SIGHZ.
):

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Chingay Heartlands at 3 places!!!!
11th Feb : Hougang

Oh this is hilarious we did all our preparations at PA thinking that we would have a bus to fetch us to Hougang.
We ended up sitting this other group's bus & had the driver to specially drop us off at Hougang.
A few days later we learnt that we actually didn't have a bus there.
Oops.

The 2 NJ kids who had dance earlier in the day~

^ I miss & love my Yuting haha.

^ My reaction towards Yuting's decision of how our hair should be.

We ended up reaching the performance place quite late & we rushed like mad!
Seriously it's my first time feeling so unprepared cuz we practically dumped our bags at some random place & the item before us was almost done.
Gosh, so heng we made it in time!!!!

The performance went by in like.. Seconds?
Went to the nearest CC to change!

^ The only one who was reluctant to undo her hair. & lol @ my fringe.

^ Apparently Yuting finds this amusing cuz it's a red camp tee but it's blue in colour..?

18th Feb : Bukit Panjang

Our holding area was once again at some CC's dance studio & we had just enough time to prepare & all.

Lol Yokekay flyingz.

While waiting for our item at backstage there was this really cute baby boy who is attracted to our 大头. Super cute!

Oh then Natalie came backstage after our performance & it surprised all of us!!!
She happened to be there cuz her aunt lives there. Coolz hehe.
Veronica dropped by too cuz she was at her grandma's house.
Talk about coincidences hehe.

Wah then idk why ah Bukit Panjang got fireworks one after everything.
Pretty!

19th Feb : Yuhua Village @ Jurong

Met up @ JE MRT & it was a bad idea cuz we ended up having to walk 1 mrt distance.
Oh goodness.

Once again we didn't have any holding area so we had to do our preparations "backstage". :/

Brandon & Ziwei forever fighting haha.

"Nooooo pictures, nooooooooo!"

We played "I have never"/"I have ever"! It's so funny cuz the guys were ganging against the girls by saying things like "I have never painted my nails before" then the girls would be like "I have never stepped into a LAN shop before". HAHAHA.

Xuanlin dropped by hehe!! So great to be seeing her after so long.

Went around with the 大头 cuz we were supposed to be giving out sweets that was never given to us. -.-
Okay it was fun cuz we were like mascots!
& the 大头 turned out to be surprisingly popular cuz many people wanted to take pictures with us!
So this is what if feels like to be a mascot! Sorta haha.
I thought the 大头 would scare the kids man haha.
Awesum experience! (:

Finished the performance then went to have dinner at Clementi Mall's Eat then parted.

Oh yes & I took the whole afternoon to rush out these cards for my loves

Was writing until I want to cry.
Sucks not knowing when is the next time you're ever gonna see them again.

All This Time

2012-02-21T00:38:00.001+08:00

“How do I start talking to you again? It's been so long and the time gap has made it feel like there's tension. It's probably my fault that we ever stopped talking, I said the wrong thing, got embarrassed and then avoided it, hoping that it would resolve itself or that you would be the one to start the conversation again. But you never did so now I assume you hate me.

But I miss you. I miss talking to you. I just don't know how to get back to where we used to be.”

Late night thoughts are here to overwhelm me again.
I wish you were here but I've probably gotten used to your absence.

& that's what hurts the most.

Reaching for a love that seems so far

2012-02-19T22:23:00.003+08:00

Late Valentine's Day Post!

Spent the V'day afternoon with Merilyn, Veronica, Vivian & Amanda Low.
Had a great time catching up with them, & they were all so excited with their JC lives. (:
Thank you Amanda for your foam heart, balloon & rose. (:

Then went to meet primary school babes, so glad I'm still in contact with them. (:
(Photo credits to Rachel!)

We had dinner at New York Desert Cafe, Holland Village! (:
But Carissa had to leave after a short while. ):

They got me helium balloons for my late birthday present. ^^

Aww pretty girl.

And then they started to imitate my face below,

and they ended up looking like this

HAHAHA.

Amanda's rose.

Then Rachel left for some date, leaving me, Shirlyn, Clarabelle & Yuanfang.

So we decided to go to the top of some HDB flat to write our wishes on the helium balloon then release it from there!
& the view from above was breathtaking.

I could see Nanhua from up there! Sigh i miss nanhua.

This girl wrote the most lol.
Anw we reach wrote on a balloon then the last balloon was for our message to God.
After everything we released it & watched it go, good feeling. (:

Shall post about Sleepover @ Merilyn's & Chingay Heartlands soon! (:
Bye for nowz.

Sheltering tree of Friendship

2012-02-15T18:04:00.003+08:00

Went out on the 12th of February to celebrate birthdays with my '95 girls.
The funny thing was that the theme of the day was Retro, & everybody was fussing about what to wear haha!!!

(All photo credits to Yingying & Amanda!)

Sweet surprise, mudpie cake from Island Creamery!!!!

^ Ying & Zoe's cross back dress.

Then we decided to head to Macs to eat!

^ Yuting my checkered buddy for the day haha!

Then we shifted to a bigger table to accommodate all of us & we played Polar Bear haha!!!
Polar Bear is sth like murderer, with everyone closed eyes heads down, the 2 bears decides who to kill, 1 healer decides who to heal & the cupid decides who to link together so that they either die/get healed together.

^ I'M DA POLAR BEAR.

^ "Why y'all keep saying me I'm not the polar bear!!!!!"

^ This picture is perfect! Litong kept saying how Kityarn has the suspicious looking face & kept accusing her of being the Polar Bear & so yeah. But unfortunately, most of the time Litong was the polar bear & she's damn good at getting people to die of innocence HAHA.

& then we played "I have never"/"I have ever"

We played a few more rounds of polar bear before heading to the Railway Track! (:

Had such an amazing time overall with my girls. My '95 girls always there for me, never fail to make my day with their love & surprises here & there.
As JC starts for most of them I really hope that we won't drift that much, they mean a lot to me.
Nevertheless, babes if y'all are reading this I just want yall to know that I love you guys so much.
All the best for your JC lives! (:

Gonna miss you girls so much.

17th

2012-02-08T22:31:00.002+08:00

My 17th was simple yet wonderfully spent.
Did a lot of catching up with Merilyn after eons, missed her so much.
Love how my words just came out & i never had to be afraid to say what's on my mind.
Love this girl so much. (:

Thank you so much to the people out there who made the effort to Whatsapp/Text/Tweet/Facebook me a birthday message!
I truly appreciate it, every single one of it.
Thank you guys, blessed by your company. (:

Chingay 2012 - A Waterway Parade of Love & Care

2012-02-05T20:59:00.005+08:00

First time as Production Crew for Chingay 2012!

Initially, the first full rehearsal in January I was super lost.
I was supposed to lead 5 PAYM dancers to standby @ Gap AB but i ended up staying with the main contingent at the start of Sector A.
Later I was supposed to lead the Indian Dancers back to get props for finale.
Ok it was all messed up & it was just bad..

BUT.
The 2 performances (3rd & 4th Feb) turned out great!!!!
Everything & everyone did so well!!! ^^

Pictures are all taken on 4th Feb. (:

& did i mention i feel so cool being part of the production crew cuz i get a walkie talkie HAHA.
K not much but.... Cool lah.

At the garage where we had to wait for briefing.

After briefing, me & Yokekay decided to get out & take pix w the performers! ^^

My Indian Dancers!!!! Seriously such a warm group of people, really friendly & appreciative. Omg I miss em.

踏歌！
Even some students from 北京舞蹈学院 were in the dance.
zxcbvndmwokw;salf'

They danced to part of this yesterday

So freakin' pretty lar wlau eh I ALSO WANT. ):
But the bad thing for them is that they had to walk in the water for Sector A to C, the water kept splashing together with their long sleeves.

We got bored then decided to find the bridge addicts at Tentage G.

Then I got everyone to take pix w the performers too lol!

^ JAP BOYS. Super adorable.

^ I was on the phone with Marissa cuz she was rushing me to go standby my group sigh so i quickly ran off after the photo.

^ PAYM Group I was supposed to standby at Gap AB.
I was only supposed to bring 2 of the 龙头，2 龙尾 & 1 Pearl.
Ite I had to rush em like mad cuz super late alr.
End up still had to wait. :/

While standing by @ Gap AB,

Opening Item!

Then I had to get the placard to go to the end of Sector F with Clement to pick up our groups for finale.
Ite Clement didn't even need to pick up his group cuz they went ahead w/o him.
Slacker.

踏歌 Float!

Walked my Indian Dance group back & once again we chatted & all.
They asked me "Girl got short cut or not ah?" (Cuz the route back to starting point was pretty long)
I said no & i felt so awful inside.
Anw they were so warm & friendly oh my. ^^

^ My Indian Dancers! ^^

While waiting for finale, one of them fainted & one guy ran up to inform me.
"GIRL MEDIC MEDIC FASTER ONE PERSON FAINTED!"
I got so scared cuz nobody responded to my walkie messages nor calls so I just ran to the First Aid corner.
I ran so fast & i felt my heart was gna drop out cuz I was so afraid that person would die or sth.

Ok thankfully the first aid arrived before we reached the tent.

Sent my Indian Dancers for finale & I said bye and all.
They were super nice to thank me & high five & smile at me.
Omg srsly soooo lovely. (:

Went back to Tentage G to find Bridge ppl.

Headed back to the garage & went to Gap AB to watch finale & fireworks! ^^

See the mass of yellow windmills. ^^

Amazing!

Headed back to the garage where everyone started to gather after some time.

Kenna splashed by the dancers at the waterway haha!!

Pig shot #1

Pig shot #2

Wet people!!!!

I'm like the only survivor muahaha.

Then the props crew (bridge people) came back with balloons.

Then we koped pompoms too!

^ YELLOW FLAG

^ Master of dry ice.

Step 1 :

Step 2 :

Step 3:
(with Terence attempting to suck it in)

Step 4 :

Tadaaaaa

& then my camera died right before we wanted to take a group picture.
Goodness.

Anw, overall being part of the Production Crew for Chingay was truly one of a kind experience.
It's actually quite fun working with the performers!
They're all so warm & bubbly.
Of course initially I was super afraid of screwing up (which I did) but thank God everything went well.

But I still prefer being a performer. HAHA.

All in all, so glad & thankful I got the chance to try being a Production Crew.
(:

2012-01-30T21:31:00.001+08:00

'95
Forever & Always

The one that got away.

2012-01-29T22:09:00.004+08:00

& I wanna lay under the stars with someone, anybody I love.
The wind would blow gently across the field to make the grass dance but I would just lay there, silent.
I'd hug the person next to me and cry.
I'd let everything out, everything I've kept inside for too long but never found the chance to let the world know how I felt inside.
The person would hug me even tighter and hold me close.
No words exchanged, yet so much explained.

Under the stars

2012-01-26T23:55:00.003+08:00

Kbox in the afternoon w my siaozhabors Amanda & Cheryl.
(Photo credits to Amanda & Cheryl!)

Cheryl's voice is srsly amazing & she had to change the songs sung by male artistes to 2 keys up to fit her voice.
On the other hand, I had to change 3 keys down for songs by female artistes to fit my voice.
Manly voice. ):
Amanda sings so loudly her voice was even louder than us using the microphone HAHAHA.

Anw we had soooo much fun jumping around the couch & tryna do raps, esp LOW - FLO RIDA HAHAHA WHOOP.

^ ♥♥♥♥

Cheryl had to go off after that for family dinner or sth then Amanda came over to my house before going over to eat at Bengkang's.

& we played Dance Central on Kinect. ^^

Which she didn't upload pix of her playing it SIGH.

We played Kinect Adventures for a bit then Xuanlin came over too.
They made fun of the drawing of chickens (representing my family)!!! ): Sighs so many different interpretations which i shan't mention here cuz it's so mean HAHAHA.

Lepak-ed a while before going out to meet Yingying at my house bus stop!
By then Amanda was dead tired from Kinect lol!!!

Reached Bengkang's & just nice the lion dance started!
Watched it plus dragon dance, then i thought of our Aitong Dragon Dance haha standard difference super lot sia.. But anw must give ourselves credit for learning it in like 2 days? whoop. ^^

Settled down for a while then nomz!
(Photo credits t Yingying. (:)

^ The wind did that to my hair. Z.

^ Kityarn joined us when we were shortly into our dinner.

Later in the night, hth talk under the stars with my loves Yingying, Kityarn, Amanda & Xuanlin.
They came over to the playground at my house there where the night sky was adorned with bright stars.

We spent like around 2h there? Just talked and all.

Then they came up to my house (to answer the call of nature lol!) & once again they made Yingying & Kityarn interpret the drawing.
SIGH.

Anw, it's nice to sit down once in a while to just talk.
I guess I haven't had such times in a long while, sharing what's been on my mind.
& the best part is when you know people share the same thoughts as you or know how you're feeling.
I couldn't ask for more.
:')

I'll miss them so much once JC starts for them.

Love such simple & sweet days.
So thankful for everything & everyone around me.
God bless! (:

Just a little closer

2012-01-22T21:13:00.003+08:00

Bball + Swim + Pool on 18th January :

Ok this group constituted of the most awkward people ever.
(photo credits to Yinghui & Amanda's FB!)

But guess what it turned out to be really super duper fun!!!!

Initially, Amanda & Junhao only wanted to gym. But ite guess who jumped into the pool with us.
trololol.

Oh yes & Amanda & Daniel did front somersaults into the pool!!!!
DA SHIZ. What the right!
But anw i did it too whoop!!!! HAHAHA SO FUN.
Water went into my nose everytime i did it no skill zz. -_____-

After that we went to the jacuzzi & play some finger games.

^ Winners yoz.

Screwed parting.

Jazlyn was super nice to feed us cheese popcorn when we were in the pool.
& we look like some dolphin lol!!

Okay a lot of unglams 我不要再 post pool pictures le HAHA.

Washed up & headed for lunch then Yenshen's house for pool!!!
I hated washing up cuz so mafan & my hair reeked of chlorine for days. ):
Yes the smell's gone now.

& YES LOOK AT OUR SLIPPERS.

Chio? Yes chio. Love the colours!!!!

Pooled at Yenshen's house & I paedo-ed with Isadora over these 2 babies lol!!!

One future soccer player the other bballer. ONZ.
Left shortly after a few rounds of pool.
Ended the day really really really happy & satisfied. :')

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CNY Rehearsal @ Aitong on 19th January :

With 舞狮，舞龙 & 高跷.

I was surprised that the dragon was pretty light at first but after swinging it for a few rounds my arms totally wna kua alr.
But overall I'm so glad I am given this opportunity to at least try!!!!
Fun. (:

Ok introducing Terry boyphrend who makes da best pineapple tarts.
(All photo credits to Amanda's FB!)

LOL CHIOOOOO.

Yingying came down to help! (:

Ok jumpshots.

.... I got tired.

There was this P6 guy in Aitong Wushu or sth who did an Ariel Cartwheel.
Wtf when we saw it we cheered like mad!!!!
So impressed.
Then we tried to psycho him come Nanhua lol!!!!
Okay imma let my son learn wushu in the future.

After a few more rounds of practice we went to have tea? with Ying, Yuting, Amanda & Kityarn at Macs!
Monopoly deal a while before going home~

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CNY Performance @ Aitong & Deyi on 20th January :

Sigh, not the best for all 3 performances we did but I can say that we truly did our best.
Gosh srsly love the dancers so much they always make me so happy.

(photo credits Amanda & Nicholas!)

Okay when we had to standby at the backstage, i was a little nervous.
I had no idea why but I guess i haven't been on stage for... a really long time.
Sigh. ):

BFF on stilts. Stewpid zai girl. Height difference pls.......

After every performance run i would pant like mad, it felt like i didn't breathe for the whole time i was on stage & only remembered to breathe when everything was over!
Terrible feeling.
Okay Deyi's performance was pretty rushed & awkward cuz the students there laughed at us when we fumbled a bit.
But well like I've said I'm doing it all for the experience so it's alright!
And also got angbao so I'M GOOD. ^^

Washed up & all then went to have lunch!
After lunch was Yingpei's house where we spammed rounds of bridge, daidi & some played mahjong!
Ok love spending time w them can't wait for 踩青 on 29th!!!!! (:

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Work on 21th & 22th January :

So thankful for Sipei & Zihui for helping me thru the first day of work!
Was assigned to work at China Bistro in USS on first day.
I felt super lost but okay i guess the best is just do what they tell you to.
& so thankful for Siyun at my workplace she's helped me so much.
The only bad thing for the day is my shoes, it gave me 2 terrible blisters on my feet which i don't think you'd wna see em.

Second day (today), was a lot better!!!!
Got to work with Zihui @ Mel's today & the staff there were super friendly!
They joked with us & yeah really constantly asked if i needed help clearing the trays.
Nice bunch of people! (:
Once again the only bad thing was my shoes, hurt real bad.
Gna get new ones soon.

Thank God for seeing me thru these days. (:

Dragon dance!

2012-01-20T19:04:00.001+08:00

OK TODAY I HAD THE TIME OF MY LIFE DOING DRAGON DANCE.
We performed both at Aitong Pri Sch & Deyi Sec Sch.

Will edit this post with pictures & more info!

Rn I'm super tired & it's gna be my first day of work tomorrow.
Wish me luck!

Lego House

2012-01-17T22:46:00.006+08:00

Happened to saw a poster by the bus stop & I noted down the website.
It was about a Non-Profit Organisation, We Day.

All we had to do is to click 'Like' & sponsors will donate USD $1 to Free The Children.

Okay I'm not really good at such stuff..
Not really advertising or whatsoever but I hope you'll just take some time off to just click a simple 'like' on We Day on FB & it could really make a lot of difference.
Don't know if people ever come to my blog or whaaaaat but trying my best to spread the message.

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People need to realise how lucky they really are.
Ok to me yah been thru the worst times of my life but I don't like to keep harboring over my loss.
Yes, sometimes the pain pricks me (explains the post on Friday 13th) on days when i think too much but I'd pray & throw those bullshit thoughts aside.

Think of it this way, if the mental pain is that bad, it'll have killed you.
So why are you torturing yourself?

YOU ARE YOU. & you definitely deserve to live the life that God has blessed you with.
Look around you! (:

You wake up to the breakfast that mom has laid out for you. It's simple, just bread & some spread.
You have food.
You text your friends using your iPhones as your thumbs sweep swiftly across the screen. You have hands with fingers & thumbs that move as you want them to.
You get out of bed, prompting yourself up with a slight push on your bedside. You stand steadily on your feet, groggy a while before making your way to the bathroom.
You are able-bodied.
It rains, and you stone at the window watching the rain pour down.
You have shelter.
It gets a little cold and you head to the cupboard to get a jacket to put over you.
You have clothes.

You have a loving family.
You have amazing friends.
You have a proper and good education.
You have ears to listen, eyes to witness.
You have so much more.

& You have a heart, to love.

Okay, this post is getting a little off topic but just hoping people love themselves & what they have.
It really hurts to see that

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It's okay to feel down sometimes, like you just wna break down & let your tears run down uncontrollably. It's perfectly alright, but just make sure you pick yourself up.
Don't hurt yourself, yeah?

Love yourself, Love others.
Bless others with your love.
(:

Okay ending this post with a pic i saw on Tumblr.

God bless. (:

Cuz we might not get tomorrow

2012-01-15T17:30:00.004+08:00

Dancehood

I went back to PA today after eons!!
I haven't been there since Chingay 2010. It felt kinda awkward initially cuz there were new faces but nevertheless the whole place is still the same.
I liked the warm feeling the place gives me. (:

Anw together w most of '95, we practiced a bit of 舞龙 without the dragon itself.
K this is increasing my anxiety about performing it on the 20th cuz i haven't even get to try the actual weight of swinging the dragon body around.
Hope I don't screw up. :/

Yes & it's so nice to see laoshi smile. (:
It makes you wna smile too. ^^

Anw helped Amanda 踩高跷 together w Jingwen & Kityarn.
Lepak-ed downstairs while the others were idk preparing for flash mob later in the evening.
Left a while later after lunching there!

Went to Bugis with

Yup kityarn, amanda & jingwen cuz we all had the urge to grab some cheap dresses from there haha!
I swapped one side of my turquoise slipper w one of Amanda's yellow slipper.
A weird side but CUTE HOR. :> Lazy take pic oops.

Amanda bought a dress & we walkwalk a while before heading back.
Love em all. (:

Lovely, simple day spent. (:

------------------------------------------------------------

Honestly need go back to dance real soon.
I hate the state my body is in.
No stamina + no muscles = ultimate turn off.
Need to slowly gain em back.

Lazy & nua me
UNACCEPTABLE.

Saying things we haven't for a while.

2012-01-13T13:14:00.003+08:00

Thinking too much,

as always.

Os Result.

2012-01-10T09:00:00.001+08:00

Hai.

So the collection of O Levels results happened in a blur yesterday. It all happened so fast that I hardly had the time to slowly recall how I felt back there.

Before I went up to get my results my brother called & he increased my anxiety. I kinda cried abit. Ok but he's been really supportive & he keeps comforting me saying "Whatever it is, it's God's best plans for you." & that did calm me down.

Ms W congratulated me for getting both As for my math only to find out she's passed me the wrong result slip. Aww man..

In any case I cried aft receiving my results cuz I was at a complete loss of what to do or feel.
But after a while i felt better cuz I know I could get into my desired course in Ngee Ann!!! :>

For those feeling upset by your results, cheer up. (: It's not the end of the world, you can still work hard & make it thru at the end of JC / Poly. Jiayou! (:

Sigh, gonna miss nanhua so much.

那些年我们在玛丽娜追过的女孩.

2012-01-07T20:42:00.003+08:00

HAI. ^^

I'm here to blog about the amazing time i had yesterday at Marina Barrage with '95 girls! (:
It was a really hothothot day, but perfect for a day out!!!!

(All photo credits to Jingwen's FB! Some pix are w Yingying yet to be uploaded. (: )

Reached the Barrage then we took some pix outside!!!

Then the heat got too extreme & we decided to just take off our shoes & go into the water!
IT FELT SO NICE.

Except for Amanda cuz she was wearing shoes.. Tsk. HAHA.

Eventually she got pushed in. ;) So.......

Sabo-ing in the water starts.

Wet &... my centre part. -____-

We walked to the top.
JUMPSHOTS & OTHER PRETTY SHOTS HERE WE GO.

Yanting flying.

Yuting's straddle makes mine look really.. cuiiiii.

Tumblr inspired photos below!!!

Cartwheels!

^ Tried to snap a shot of Yuting's perfect ariel but i just couldn't get the right timing! This was the best i could snap. ):

^ Running on air in attempt to copy Amanda's spider man move below.

倒踢

Blow wind blowwww.

Oh yes & we found this tangled kite string & Yuting decided to untangle it to make it into a really long string, to make a new kite.......................

Out of an Old Chang Kee bag.
It worked!!! But it flew too low even with Yingying tryna run to make it fly. ):

Then we left soon after around 1 cuz the people there had to test the water sprinklers.
& cuz the heat was unbearable.

(:

Love my girls sososo much.

----------------------------------------------------------------------

CCA Extravaganza today!!!
Met Kityarn @ 845 at Clementi today.
We ended up having to rush to catch the mobile display which was the first programme of the day.
What the heck I ran a mere 50m or sth & i was panting like mad.
No dance now stamina like ~!@#$%^&*()

Okay on the plus side we managed to catch the dance item! Missed a lil of the front only. (:

Went up to the studio & so thankful the S4s let us join in the mass dances.
Ahhhh kinda miss em much.
Anw it was great to see '95 again oh gosh miss them. ):

Left around 12? Headed to Amanda's house to playyyyyy Wii!!!!!
Jwen & Kityarn came afterwards & we played Taboo!
Ridiculous descriptions srsly HAHAHA.

Pictures up soon! Or sth hahaha.

Bai. (:

You stand a little too tall, say a little too much.

2012-01-05T22:06:00.004+08:00

I was bloghopping today & I somehow got linked to Szeying's blog

& I found this video! (Credits to her!)

"Could we hurry this up cuz I'm getting a lil pruny in here."
HAHAHAHA.

Then I got hooked & I linked linked linked to all the other related videos!!!!

"Punkass kid!"
I almost died laughing at that last statement.

I liked how she threw the food then Voldermort turned around HAHA.

My life lengthened oh my goodness.

Makes me wonder.

2012-01-04T15:18:00.007+08:00

Hai.

Okay so I'm finally back from my super long holiday & I haven't really done a proper post about it.
Actually I won't post about it, it's too long & i took around a thousand pictures.
So.. Here are few of my personal favourites!

New York!
It is a really nice place! I actually would have enjoyed my tour there more if it wasn't for nasty people in my tour group. Doing nothing but cause trouble.
Anyway, loved the city a lot! I love the hot soups in the cold weather even more. ^^

After New York was Orlando, DISNEYLAND.
The 4 themeparks in Disneyland were amazing!
Except for the fact that there were strollers everywhere and you had to try hard not to trip over them & kids scrambling everywhere.

I suppose my favourite ride of all was the Tower of Terror in Hollywood Studios.

You sit on a lift & you literally plunge down vertically for 13 floors.
I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW HOW SOMEONE LIKE ME TERRIFIED OF HEIGHTS ACTUALLY MANAGED TO FIND THE GUTS TO SIT THAT.
But it was super thrilling & AWESOME.
Just go for it, really.
& you'll come out feeling like a hero.

Oh yes & the iconic Cinderella's Castle in Magic Kingdom.

With fireworks at night!

Next, Universal Studios Florida!!!

It is definitely muchmuch bigger than Sg's one! Even the rides are longer & better haha!
Esp the Revenge of the Mummy! Thrill x100!
Tho the Sg one is not bad alr haha!

Anw I love the people in there!
There was this show where they show you how they makeup for horror movies.
& the host was hilarious!!!

She : Warning this is gonna be scary!!!! MAKE YOUR KIDS SEE THIS. This is not Disney so I don't have to care about the children.

HAHAHA. I love her!

Then we sat for some rides here & there before settling down for some parade.
With the best ice cream. :>

Next is my favourite theme park!

ISLANDS OF ADVENTURE

Yes The Wizardry World of Harry Potter is found in there & you've got to ride
HARRY POTTER & THE FORBIDDEN JOURNEY.
It was madness the waiting time was up to 2h!!!!
But it was worth it man srsly.
I rode on it twice HAHA.
Um it got stuck the second time but well good experience hanging up there slanted on your back hehe.

Oh & guess the drink below.

It's Butter Beer!!
The taste is quite a disappointment i would say cuz it just tastes like ginger ale with ice cream on top.
But still, one of a kind!

Alright that's about it i guess!
Had the most amazing time in the States & i would definitely go back again!!!!

-------------------------------------------------------------

Back in Sg.......

Staring at my mess of luggage & clothes.

.........................
Help.

Ok on the plus side I GET TO SEE MY '95 GIRLS FOR THE NEXT 3 DAYS.

-------------------------------------------------------------

I saw this video on Youtube, & i cried like mad after watching it.
& as quoted from a Youtube user,
"I feel insulted that this turned out to be an advertisement."

For the first time.

2012-01-01T18:12:00.003+08:00

I won't do a long list of new year resolutions to accomplish because i know that's just me being too ambitious & over realistic.

So instead, I'll do my best to achieve the few below.

1) To be a better person than I ever was the day before.
2) Be quick to listen & slow to speak.
3) Be more patient, love more & hate less.

Kindness moves mountains. Acceptance opens doors, makes room for change, diffuses misunderstanding.

-Dianna Agron

Have a great 2012 everyone. (:

I am glad you came.

2011-12-31T09:24:00.003+08:00

Last post of 2011! (Edited)

2011 has indeed been an amazing year. But I know, I've been thru so much that I don't wna rewind them. Cuz I know everything happens for a reason, & it's by the grace of God that I'm standing here today, stronger than ever. (:

2011, I learnt that relationships aren't everything. I'm v thankful for all the little memories here & there. 1 year wasn't easy, I'm glad it happened, I'm glad you're still here, as my friend. (:

People come & go, they seemed perfect for a while but then they disappear, everytime. It hurts, so bad. To go thru the exact same thing as I did 2 years ago. But now I see things differently. The tears & the sleepless nights paved another path for me, a path of strength. It's time that I realised, reliance on solely one person ain't gonna work out. Sometimes there are battles we have to fight ourselves, & it's gonna be alright. (:

--------------------------------------------------------------------------
It's thru all these heartache, that led me to a even more beautiful thing in life, the gift of friendship. :')

Starting with 410.

And all the other special people who made 2011 such an amazing year.

The gift of friendship touches the heart like no other love can.

2011, I realised who are the people who will stick by me thru everything. The feeling's so amazing, just knowing you have friends around you to pull you up when you fall. I can't explain how much I truly appreciate everyone.
The little acts of kindness, listening ears, happiness, tears shed, memories shared, I'll always remember them.
Really. :')

This is the year that the times in both my dance in NAFA & NHDS come to an end too.

NAFA, where do I begin?

My favourite place to escape the world & get lost in dance. Not to forget my favourite girls who always make my day by just seeing them. If it wasn't for 邹老师，I wouldn't even be in NHDS. She's given me so much opportunity in dance & has really made dance part of who I am today. 10 years with her & my NAFA babes just flew by like that, but the memories will always stay with me.

NHDS, I've learnt so much.

Definitely, 老师 is my second dad. I'll never forget his teachings in life. I think if it wasn't for NHDS, I wouldn't have opportunities to participate in mass dances. It's simply amazing.

'95, my favourite brothers & sisters.

Srsly went thru so much together. We always had so limited time to choreograph our dances!!! 1 week for both teachers day & speech day! It was really hectic, but it was heartwarming to see the seniors also so supportive & often dropped by on us during choreography. & we did it, together. :') Looking back now, it brought smiles to my face & I really miss all of them so much. 4 years together wasn't easy. :')

Juniors, taught me that I had to be patient. Esp 96. Seeing them leading the whole NHDS now somehow makes me feel.. Proud of them. :')

I had the opportunity to spend a long vacation with my family too. & I realised no matter what at the end of the day, they're gna be your strongest pillar of support. So dont take them for granted & continue to be patient to love them more. (:

------------------------------------------------------------------------
Alright I guess that's about it, the content is pretty brief tho it's lengthy. But this is truly a remarkable year & all I have to say is that, I'm thankful for all that I went thru. (:

& thank you for putting up with the lengthiness to read up till this point.
I just wna let you know that, I love you. & thank you for being part of my life. :')

Happy 2012! (:

It's the time of the year

2011-12-25T14:26:00.002+08:00

MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!! ^^

好想拥抱你，拥抱错过的勇气

2011-12-09T23:36:00.000+08:00

Sometimes when I miss you, I put those records on

2011-12-07T19:06:00.002+08:00

Went to Jurong Point with Cheryl to catch

The movie was pretty alright I just think that it's a little draggy.
& 小鬼 was damn cute in it. ^^

Got bored & went over to her house after lunch.
Lepaktime101.

Love lazylazy days like these. (:
Baiiiiii.

I pray for all your love

2011-12-05T15:38:00.003+08:00

Wow I didn't realise this is my first post in December.

Anyway I haven't been doing much but watching this

HAHAHAHAHA it's awesome!!!!!

I'm so glad yappy introduced me to this show it's really so damn addictive.
The only reason why I'm here is cuz I'm waiting for my episode to load......

Anyway, I kinda like how I'm feeling these days.
Not wanting anything, not thinking much about anything.
For some reason I think it's a wonderful feeling to stone.
Isn't it nice to just stare blankly into space w/o anything on your mind?
So your mind's just empty & drifting about........
Isn't that nice?
K maybe it's just me.

I guess I'll be updating more often about minor stuff since I'm flying off on 10 Dec.
See how!

Back to my Criminal Minds! :>

Lighter than air

2011-11-30T20:40:00.008+08:00

There'll be 4 parts to this post :
1) Prom Night,
2) Cultural Potpourri,
3) Class Chalet,
4) Baking session with Yingying, Amanda & Kityarn.

------------------------------------------------------------------------

Prom Night on 21st Nov!

Preparation was done at Yuting's house together with her, Yanting, Yingpei & Yokekay.
Omg haha it was really fun!
One of a kind experience!

We kinda spent a lot of time on our nails & Yanting was always "哎呀，还有很多时间的！"

So yeah, preparations!

Introducing our amazing hair stylist, Yuting.

Btw ps about the weird sizes of the photos previously.

She did my hair!

Look! That girl's insanely awesome.

Oh we attempted this before and after look.
We didn't manage to take for everyone of us cuz busy doing stuff. :/

Before :

After :

So we later chiong like maddddd & cabbed to Amara Hotel together with Lin Bo & Ziwei.
Everyone looked amazing. (:
(photos from FB!)

^ Me : Geog buddy i want take picture w you!
KangJun : 拍照啊？要不要 Twist 要不要！
*TWIST*
LOL.

^ My amazing 95, love them so much.

Went over to Quah's house w the girls (below) for a sleepover~

Love em. ^^

^ My tired face the next day.

Prom was good, it was really nice to see everyone looking so dashing & beautiful.
Will never forget that night. :')

------------------------------------------------------------------------

Cultural Potpourri on 23rd Nov!

Had batch dinner before heading over to UCC!
Camwhore like madddddd.

^ My beetch. ♥

^ I think this picture is cute hehe.

------------------------------------------------------------------------

Class Chalet! 28 - 30 Nov

Went there pretty late & it was drizzling. ):
Anw after the rain stopped i went to chiong cycle!!
I cycled 3 times HAHA anyhow kope ppl's bike.

Anw me, Amanda & Quah had this impromtu decision to stay for chalet.
HAHA yes in our stinky clothes.

BBQ was good! Thanks to the guys (esp 411) if not we'd have no food lol!
Junhao, Zhixiang, Minghui, Xinhuei, Valerie, Amanda & I played w Jingyu's sparklers. He's so generous man!!!
& LOOK AT THESE

^ Look at our pretty infinity signs. ^^ ♥

^ 281111

^ First attempt. Me & Zhixiang's 4 ended up looking like circles.

^ Second attempt. 4 done by Xinhuei & Minghui!!

We went Night Cycling from Aloha Changi all the way to East Coast Park & back.
The total journey there and back was around a total of 40km.
MY LEGS DIED.
The whole airplane runway was the most torturous part.
The entire road was just straight, & you srsly can see no end.
When you reach the end though you're just YES I AM LEGEND.

By the time we reached the Macs @ ECP everyone just crashed.
We took around 3-4h to reach there!
I slept, really bth.
Good thing there was Jingyu's heat cream or my thighs really wouldn't make it back.

& I'm so thankful for the people who kept cheering me on. :')
"Ninja let's go you can do this!"

Somehow our group of 25 people split into 3 groups & I was the last.
I was thankful i was the last group, cuz we managed to play by Changi Beach!
& maybe see a bit of the "sunrise"

From

To

The entire beach then was almost empty.
We took off our shoes and just went into the waters.
The water was really clear!!!

Then the few of us just stood in one whole row, & screamed.
I finally fulfilled my desire to let everything out.
Everything felt so right, really.
As i was screaming all the unhappiness just disappeared.
Gone, all gone. :')
That feeling was really indescribable.

Nothing is better than spending mornings with a few friends by the beach, just watching the sunrise & enjoying the morning breeze.
I really love the feeling, so much. :')

That was my best part in the whole night cycling. (:

Headed back to the chalet & slept a while here and there before heading back home!

------------------------------------------------------------------------

Baking Session today w Yingying, Amanda & Kityarn.

Met Kityarn @ 10 at Woodlands and we bought ingredients to make our Triple Chocolate Chunk Muffins. :3
Amanda came & we had breakfast while waiting for Yingying to come.
Headed to Kityarn's house afterwards!

For more details on how to make em can go Kityarn's blog here!

Camwhored while waiting for it to be done.

^ Attempt at Taylor Swift's eyes. LOL.

^ Spot the spoiler.

^ Our end products! Oops watch your drool. ;)

FINALLY DONE W THE SUPER LONG POST!
Goodnight guys! (:

Thankful.

2011-11-26T19:21:00.001+08:00

Hi guys! Been going out these days & yeah will do a short update about a charity event (or fun fair) I attended today.

Me, Xuanlin & Amanda helped out at this booth for Singapore Association for the Deaf. We were just required to learn some basic hand sign languages & teach it to the public. It was a really good experience & some people were really friendly. :>

I think the highlight of my day was this performance where they did dance showing sign language for the entire song of Bruno Mars' Just The Way You Are.
That was truly the most meaningful dance I've ever watched. It was so heart warming & ahhhh it's so. :') It just makes me feel so blessed to just be able to... Hear.

Irreplaceable, loved haven.

2011-11-20T17:23:00.004+08:00

(All photo credits to Murong!)

This is it, the very last lesson for the Grade 13 in NAFA.
Hmm, where do i begin?
(This post is mainly gonna be about my times in NAFA, gna be pretty lengthy. You can not read it you want to. (: )

NAFA has always been a part of my life.
I remembered how 邹老师 brought me in.
It was during Primary 1 in FMPS, oh gosh I was soooo blur then.

I think it was a dance audition, and I got in cuz I was quite flexible then.
And yeah, after one or two lessons 邹老师 told me to go her some 南洋艺术学院.
I did.
It was 30th January.

Through my times in NAFA, I've had some ups and downs.
I remember when I was around 9 years old I hated to go dance practices!
I would scream and kick and cry at home (yes immature i know) cuz i was really cranky!!
Gradually as time goes by, the tantrums reduced and it became more of a routine for me to go to NAFA every Sunday morning.

NAFA became more than just a place for me to dance.
It was like my second home.

The most memorable times were the classes for 心韵 on Friday nights of 2010.
Me, Litong, Xuejing & Pinxin had to rush down all the way after our dance with NHDS to attend 1h of practice.
It was worth it.
Idk how to put it but, the moment I knew i was in the NAFA campus i don't feel sad.
Dance was always there.

Through NAFA, I've met an amazing group of girls who i know i could always count on.

Always got my back.
I know I can always talk nonsense with them and being with them just makes my day.
They've been with me, through my sorrow and joy.
They are the reason why I stood strong when things, esp in NH, fail me.
I know I can always rant to them and they will always make me laugh by making silly remarks.
I love them, so much.

& of course, I wouldn't be here today if it wasn't for 邹老师.

She's amazing.

Under her guidance, I've learnt so much.
Honestly, without her I wouldn't have even gotten into Nanhua.

She never gave up on me, I'm really thankful.
She's always so strong, so cheerful.
I love how she always digress and talk to us about her life stories and her views on tv shows and all, it's funny and then she'll always go “哎哟，说了那么多。反面！” and we'll have to continue the dance.

She's been really supportive of me.
I'm not a good dancer, yet she's always giving me opportunities to shine in her dances.
She made me feel so confident, so proud of who I am because she believed in me.

She's always teaching us new things, the dances from her training times and they were all so pretty.
She often told us to learn as much as we can because it's all for the benefit of our knowledge.

I. Ah i'm crying rn I can't really process what i wna type.

I love 邹老师, she's been with me for 10 years now and I can't believe this is my last lesson with her.

Thank you 邹老师, for all your love and guidance.
For all your faith and trust in me,
for making me who i am today,
for your love for Chinese Dance that has ignited a passion within me,
for sharing life's little joys and experiences,
for helping me to find a way to be happy when i was sad,
for everything, that you've done for all of us.

邹老师, 谢谢你。

I'll never forget my amazing journey in NAFA.

----------------------------------------------------------------

Posting this is making me cry.
It's also making me realise how blessed I am.
I mean, I have a complete, loving family who's always so supportive of me.
NHDS ; the one place you know your brothers and sisters are always there, and you'll never be alone.
410 ; most crazy, weird, awkward class ever. but that is why i love them.
NH school mates ; people who are like the stars in my sky, can't see them, but they are always there.
FMPS babes ; girls who love me no matter what, even if i haven't met up with them in eons, they never fail to call me to every single meet up they have.

And whoever reading this, thank you for being part of my life, one way or another.
I'm so thankful.
:')

Zeal.

2011-11-16T21:53:00.002+08:00

(Photo credits to Murong)

Went to Murong's birthday chalet with Minying, Litong & Yuling yesterday.
For some reason I was really really happy to be able to meet up with them idk why I love em so much.

We first met at Lavender MRT & both Litong & Minying says it's an awkward station!!
I've no idea why.

Cabbed to the Chalet & we played pool after meeting the birthday girl at the bowling alley.
K I SUCK AT POOL. ):
Headed back to the chalet around 7 plus and we helped with the BBQ.
Man the food was awesome.

Slacked around & watched teevee before we went & wasted our lives at the fondue fountain.
MY LIFE IS COMPLETE.
HAHAHAHAHA.

After playing a few rounds of Bridge I left with Tong for home.
Reached home smelling like barbeque but it made my day to see my girls. (:

Could have stayed longer if not for the rehearsal today.
Speaking of which, the rehearsal was a complete disappointment.

Can we stop the world from turning

2011-11-14T10:33:00.003+08:00

O Levels are over for me.

HAHAHA YAYYYYYY.

Okay it really isn't that exciting now that I've one less thing to do.
& waking up would feel so empty cuz you've nothing else to do; no more school, studying nor books.
So it pretty much has good and bad.

For some reason I'm thinking of this picture now.

It's sth like so trapped & struggling to get out of the ropes that bind and hold us down.

I miss being in dance.
):

Everything is coming to an end.
My NH journey, times in NAFA.

......................... ):

It´s been so quiet since you´ve gone
And every day feels more like a year
Sometimes I wish I could move on
The memories would all just disappear

So many things I should've
Said when I had the chance
So many times we took it all for granted

I´d never thought this could ever end
I´d never thought I´d lose my best friend
Everything is different now
Can we stop the world from turning?

I´d never thought I´d have to let you go
I´d never thought I´d ever feel this low
I wish I could go back
And we'd stop the world from turning

Just to go back again.

2011-11-06T21:22:00.002+08:00

I woke up one day to realise how much I miss being in dance.
It kinda struck me as a really random thought like hey, i miss those days when we had to be stuck in those sweaty & sticky body suit & slacks and still run around like crazy people with a lion chasing em or something.

And then the picture of 95 flashed past in my head and gosh i miss them so much. ):
Really so badly.
I saw these pictures on Yingying's blog. We took them on the last day of school.

Oh & i realised Yingying mentioned me a lot in her blog hehe i love you too babe!

I love the second picture a lot cuz everyone looks so crazy & ahhhhhhh it makes me miss '95 even more.

):
--------------------------------------------------------------

So anticipating the end of Os man seriously, I'm so afraid I'll burn out & fall sick right after Os. Pray I'd be strong enough to make it thru.
Left E.History, Geog Paper 2 & Sciences Paper 1s to go.

Cmon it's near the end gogo!
So excited to shop for prom hehe. ^^

I miss '95. );

2011-10-27T23:55:00.001+08:00

I got the burning urge to cycle right now.

Mood's down in the dumps.

Last Official School Day

2011-10-14T22:20:00.001+08:00

My heart just aches, I can't believe 4 years just flew by.

Will update more in due time.
Meanwhile, here are the gifts from the teachers today.

Pencil & Pen from Ms Kee, the total cost for the stationeries is actually $3.10!!!! Sweet. (:

Stress ball, lead & personalised note from Ms Wong. She's seriously the best form teacher, always so supportive, loving & truly amazing. :')

Pen & personalised note from Ms Koh. She actually went to hunt & buy the specific pens we use for exams. :')

Oh yes, Mrs Chng & Mr Tan also treated us to AWFULLY CHOCOLATE muffins oh my the chocolatey goodness was simple heavenly. ^^

Nanhua will always be my second home.

You never know unless you experience it

2011-10-07T22:40:00.001+08:00

I was texting Cheryl & we realise how little time we have in left in Nanhua.

Can you believe it? Just 6 more days to the end of everything in your Secondary School days. Just think about the things you're gna miss so bad : your classmates, the canteen food, having lessons with your class, retarded laughs you had with your friends etc. Most importantly another chapter of your life is gna be closed, & it's time to further your studies, with everyone going different directions.

I can't believe how much my heart is aching to realise the fact that my journey in Nanhua is coming to an end.
I'd relieve all the memories but I know i have to move on.

I'm thankful for the beautiful memories & wonderful people who have contributed to the best times in Nanhua.

Being in Nanhua is truly one of the best things of my life. :')

Further

2011-10-01T21:08:00.001+08:00

Received these lil cuties & it made my day so much. The giraffe was from Laysiew & the lion's from Robin & Merilyn. The giraffe made my day first thing in the morning & Robin & Merilyn surprised me with the lion! I was really really touched & happy. :')

Okay anw now that I'm feeling better, time to get those engines working again. It sucks when everyone around you is telling you you can't do it.

Can't give up, wont give up.

What do I do

2011-09-23T22:47:00.001+08:00

Am feeling better today, thankq for all the well wishes thru texts & all I truly appreciate em all. (:

Fever's gone down, throat still hurts & nose is still blocked. Hope t get well by tmr & start working. Feel so hopeless doing nth but eat & sleep.

Anyway, I've no idea why I am being a complete bitch today. Like I get cranky when things don't go my way. This is getting out of hand & even I am scaring myself. I feel so much angst in me!! Ughhh has the fever gotten into my head? I have to calm the heck down my goodness.

Ugh what's wrong I can't help feeling so cranky.

Kk don't judge my ugly sick face whatever.
Got a feeling I'll remove this post soon or sth. Hmm.

Never gonna leave this bed

2011-09-22T19:04:00.001+08:00

Hi. Prelims are finally over but I'm stuck sick at home today with some viral infection. Resulted in fever, flu & sore throat. Went to the doctor's & omw home I was just thinking how fortunate it is to be able to receive treatment for my sickness, hahaha random but it's always good to be thankful.

Anw, I had a really weird dream & it felt so real. I woke up almost crying, I had no idea why I'd even dream of such stuff. Oh well, the crazy thoughts when you're sick mm.

So, there's only around 30 days to Os & I only have ~22 days left in NH. man how time flies man seriously. Hai.

Okay now off to have my dinner, pop my pills then sleep.

You don't know you're beautiful.

2011-09-17T20:05:00.002+08:00

3/4 of prelims are over!!!
Can't imagine end of Os.

I'm really aiming to improve my L1R5 for this prelim 2.

Okay anyway, for the whole of this week my body clock's been messed up oh my goodness.
I don't like sleeping at irregular hours & i realise my temper's getting worse. Mm okay i need better control over my own emotions. I'm glad i'm thinking lesser too!!

Prelim week has been hectic, tons of cramming & endless practices.
It's all gonna be worth it.
In the midst of all the mugging, one thing this week really made me smile.

Receiving a note from this girl.

Yingying ah,

Silly girl, yes we've been a little caught up with studies & stuff but y'know i never forget you.
you can always always confide in me! i promise i will be here to listen to you. (: don't be afraid of burdening me luh you never were and never will be a burden, don't say that alright?
i miss you too, all the times at the fitness corner & silly dances, & definitely our htht.
i wish i could hug you rn. ):
anw babe, i just wna let you know that i will be here for you. i know things may be tiring for you right now but press on. things are gonna be alright. (: after prelims, imma book you kay! go paktor. ^^

I love you babe. :')

----------------------------------------------------------------------

I'm excited to receive Prelim results yet i'm afraid i won't do as well & just feel so. ._.

If I did as well as those smart peeps I would

Then if i didn't do as well, they better

me. imma slap em if they high five me.

I don't even know what i'm saying.
-.-

♟ How do you typically spend Friday nights?
lepak at homeeee.

Before they overwhelm me

2011-09-13T23:21:00.001+08:00

Thankful for an exam break tomorrow, I feel extremely listless & like my brains have totally shut down or sth.
Gotta rush studies, I barely touched Chem & Geog. Ugh.

Seeing old people smile makes my day. :') I'm hyper sensitive to them, hmm. I gotta learn proper Hokkien from my grandma soon.

All the best to E.Lit & Bio students tomorrow! (:

Take it slow.

2011-09-10T17:51:00.004+08:00

Friday was one of the best days of my life after one whole tiring week.
It was great unwinding with my pri sch loves & nafa babes.

Friday 9th Sep!
Yappy's birthday & i spent the morning having breakfast & catching up with Mrs Tay & my babes.
It was really funny, recollecting all the pri sch days & seeing how everyone has changed since then.

Good times. (:

(Photo credits to Rachel's FB!)

Mrs Tay then brought us all back into FMPS! Everything inside looked so small & puny omg haha. Not like I've grown much in height anw BUT STILL.

Went up to Mrs Tay's desk & we are forever fascinated by her collection.
Somehow secretly thankful I don't take Biology HAHA.

Oh, we had the honour of dissecting this 2 year old cocoon which was supposed to.. (IDK WHAT'S THE SCIENTIFIC TERM FOR THIS, yes i'm hopeless at bio) become a moth but apparently it didn't. So we dissected the 2 year old cocoon stuck in a leaf & it pretty much looked like this

There was also this bee, & i thought the surface of the bee looked hairy so i asked

Me : Huh but won't the surface of the bee be hairy?
Mrs Tay : No what, the hair all decompose & all it's left it's the exoskeleton.
Me : I don't take Bio.....
Mrs Tay : WE LEARNT THIS IN PRIMARY 3.

-FACEPALM-. I'm retarded lol wth.

Went to our usual hangout place & the benches look so much shorter.
Continued going around to take shots in random places of the school.

After that, I had to run off to meet my nafa babes. So sorry Yappy & yall for not being able to stay longer. ):
I miss em already.

Left to meet Tong @ Buona Vista then left for Somerset together.
Met up w Murong & Amanda and we left for lunch before Sheryl & Yanling came.
We went to H&M!!
The queue was pretty fast anw there's soooooo many people inside until you see the crowd also sian already.

(Photo credits to Murong's FB!)

Saw this denim blue Canvas shoes that I regretted not buying.
Oh my goodness. Anw it took me forever to decide so forget it lor hahaha.
Headed to Cineleisure to meet Yuling & get Gongchaaaaaa.

Yes i miss this girl so badly.

Walked to Far East Plaza, & we were stopped by this random person who offered t take a polaroid for all of us.

After walking around FEP for a while, me Yuling Murong & Amanda went to Macs to study.
The Macs there was like a secret underground tunnel & Yanling was saying what if it floods at Orchard. Haha geegee.

Left around 535, sorry Murong for not pei-ing you to Wisma!! :/

Happyhappy day. Really, nothing beats catching up with the people whom you don't meet as often.
So thankful for them & the people in my life. <3

--------------------------------------------------------------------
On a sidenote, I really love nigahiga & gang.
Hahahahaha.

Absolutely true, though I do use acronyms.
Who doesn't?!
A few understandable acronyms are fine, just don't overdo it.

HHMTPF!

♞ How long did your last phone call last?
30 seconds, really.

i'm through holding onto people who aren't even willing to look back at me.

So amazing.

2011-09-07T20:22:00.005+08:00

(Photo Credits to Merilyn's FB!)

To Robin & Merilyn,

I'm truly thankful for the two of you. You guys are irreplaceable in my life & I'm reallyreally glad God brought us all together. Things changed after we went to Hillsong's concert & I am so glad God blessed me with such amazing people like you in my life. You guys have tolerated my annoying BJ spams and mood swings, through everything you guys have been there and I know that you guys will always be. I am immensely thankful for you two. No words could ever say how much you guys mean to me.

Times spent with you two are simply comfortable & I really love how we can just sit down anytime and anywhere & just blabber away about anything under the sun. The best thing is, we have so much in common!!! It's really funny, thinking back on all the things we did together. Coming up w secret acronyms only the 3 of us know, imitating stuff, spastic jumpshots etc. I love you guys, a lotttttt. :')

Honestly, you guys are like one of the best thing that's ever happened to me this year. Through the struggles and bad times this year, you two are like this light at the end of the tunnel & I am ever so thankful God guided me out of the tunnel & to you guys. I really don't ever wna lose you two amazing friends in the whole wide world. I pray that God will watch over our friendship & see us thru as we grow old and still remain in close contact. Truly thankful for our amazing friendship. :') & I just wna let you guys know that I'll be there for you two, as much as you guys have been there for me. Thank you for all the love, joy, faith and everything else you two have given me, I am truly blessed by our friendship. (:

Anyway, here's a song to conclude my dedication to you two.
I love you twoooooo. :')

Amazing - Janelle

No matter where, how far you wander
For a thousand years or longer
I will always be there for you
Right here with you
I hope your tears are few and fast
I hope your dreams come true at last
I hope you find love that goes on and on and on and on and on
I hope you wish on every star
I hope you never fall too far
I hope this world can see how wonderful you are

God bless you two. :')

Open your eyes.

2011-09-02T18:06:00.002+08:00

I absolutely admire people who can play the piano, honestly I've tried it & it seems like my fingers will stiffen or go into a spasm.
Not cut out for music. ):

Though I'm actually tryna play the two songs above on piano.
Failing damn badly, yes.

Will attempt to update more about life.
Ms Wong's Birthday, Mid Autumn Festival & Teacher's Day.

♝ What is the book you are currently reading? Do you like it so far?
Er, do textbooks count?

My, how much things have changed.

The glint of joy.

2011-08-26T20:44:00.004+08:00

Omg haha layers of dust collected on my lappy. just kidding, it isn't that bad.

SS & Emath prelim papers today were kinda a disaster cuz i got stunned on the first question of Emath. Oh my goodness can you believe it, 1st question of Emath. Yeah that's kinda stupid. & i left out several points for my SS essay but bah hope my explanation of the other factor's sufficient.

Went to eat at Ikea with Cheryl, Xuanlin, Amanda, Cecilia, Merilyn, Patrick, Xavier & Yewwei after papers & i haven't laughed so hard since idk when omg really made my day. (: Lepak after that @ Jurong Area haha dumb truth or dare session w C, X, A HAHAHA omg love em loads. (:

-----------------------------------------------------------------------

Concluded probably my last performance of 心韵 at NAFA during "A Celebration of Chinese Dance 2011". Sweet memories.

(! All photo credits to Murong luvluv).
Rehearsals

Performance Day 20 August 2011

FROWNY.

We were allocated our "dressing room" in Campus 1 when the theater was in Campus 3 & it felt so retarded to cross 2 roads in our costumes before performance.
Can you imagine, a bunch of people in costume, hairdo & makeup crossing the street?

That probably explains why we ended up having a creeper outside our room & peeping into our room twice. WTF thankfully for Yani she's like our 大姐姐. She confronted him & he said "I was just playing a fool with you all." *gay action*. freaked the hell out of us.

& YANLING CAME BACKKKKKK. <3

A GAZILLION THANKS TO YULING'S MUM FOR CARRYING ALL OF THESE FROM ILLUMA.

Took Sheryl's car home yay thanks babe.
went hope feeling so so so so satisfied & contented.

I guess that night was really one of the best nights i've ever had this year, i don't know what to say but it's just the kinda feeling of being with the people who share the same joy & passion as you is simply amazing. & i truly love all of them, they just make me feel so good about myself & aiyah, i lovelovelovelovelove em so much. :') the thought of not being able to meet up much is quite saddening to me but I'll always always remember that night oh my goodness so long winded but yeah. Thankful. :')

♜ What is the last joke at which you can remember laughing?
Amanda's toilet paper dare!!!!

"but you held your pride like you should have held me"

13

2011-08-18T23:21:00.003+08:00

Currently facing a whirlpool of emotions & confusion that's been distracting me for the whole of my afternoon. I hate how these little things still bug me after so long & the worst part is that I hate myself for letting myself still get affected by it like oh my goodness Jinglin LET IT GO. I don't get why you always win at my game. Maybe I'm just weak but still. Idk if it's my fault for feeling this way.
& I realised ; the lesser you know, the better.

School's been pretty fine & night study was productive! Thankful.

TGIF it's Friday tmr which means there's dance w my girls. Looking forward to it but not at the same time cuz it'd be our last practice till idk when. Ughhhhh. ): Nevertheless I'm still thankful for being to dance my frustrations away & be with my NAFA babes. (:

Tho life may not be as smooth sailing but I'm grateful for my friends in school who's been there to give encouragement, joy etc that make times through these unhappy events less lonely. (:

Gna pray & crash after packing my bag or sth, goodnight y'all. (:

Drop everything now, meet me in the pouring rain.

2011-08-15T21:25:00.003+08:00

Late post for 6 August:

Goodness I'm so thankful for this bunch of people. It felt so good to be catching up with them again for Clarabelle's bday celebration. It always feels comfortable with them, even if we haven't met up for a really long time. I love them so much. Hope the Fairsians having their Prelims now are doing fine. (:

---------------------------------------------------------

Been having NAFA practices & I'm so happy i'm finally having practices again!! Missed my girls so much. For the 2 weeks of dance I've missed, I had 3 consecutive days of 心韵 practices with them hoho happy. (: I love them i love them.

We had rehearsal at some studio & we had fun imitating this frowning girl it became our trait too HAHA. Gosh it's so tiring to frown.

---------------------------------------------------------

Class item was kinda messed up today w/o the music gosh. But well we all had a really enjoyable & memorable time choreographing & all. Yeah it was all worth it!! (: May the best class win hehe.

Night study was pretty productive i guess. Oh my goodness my life's getting boring. But i'm thankful for the fact that things have been going pretty smoothly for me so yeah Amen! (:

I gotta get an Oscar award for acting this great.
"Is it killing you, like it's killing me."

oh whywhywhy hm.

Dance till you're dead.

2011-08-07T13:22:00.008+08:00

wow the spider webs collected here k trol.
anw i don't know what to say up here anymore since life's mundane, as i've said before lah so yeah.
gonna have to get those engines running fasterrrrrr.

so tell me why.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Friday's night study was crazy, one dumb SS Os question got us debating like mad ugh so confusing.

Oh & look at the number of Koi Yew Wei, Cheryl & I brought back from Clementi.
(photo credit Patrick)

there were a total of like 23 Large Koi we had to lug back from Clementi omg.
It was epic, seriously. & 23 mannnnn.
WE ARE LEGEND.

OH YES Cheryl and Glenda went crazy over Super Junior's Mr Simple HAHA i laughed till my stomach hurts so bad my abs were evident HAHAHA.
k fine maybe not the abs part but whooop.

The first time i heard it was whoa omg almost everything was auto tuned & like mm i still prefer their It's Youuuuuu.
Aww & Donghae still looks the same hehe Fishy.
I don't really like blonde Eunhyuk!! ):

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Had an awesome Saturday with Shirlyn, Clarabelle, Szeting, Carissa, Yuanfang, Rachel & Charmaine @ Food For Thought. Can't believe we visited the museums lol k! haha pix soon lala.
Hope you enjoyed yourself Clarabelle!!! (:

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Nafa was great today & we finally got our dance skirts omg both of them costs like $75 altogether it was like daylight robbery. anw, going back to going dance on friday nights hehe MISS MY GIRLS SO MUCH.

Saw a tweet on Twitter & it brought me to thingsweforget.bs & omg this website's lovely.
It sticks random post its of encouragement in random places & omg.

Wouldn't it be nice if you happen to spot one of these along the streets?
Plus they're yellow HAHA.
Thankyou the person behind all these mannnnn.

I miss Yuling it's been ages since I talked to her. );

♛ Why do you hate the person you hate most?
i don't hate i just get annoyed.

You're just a daydream away.

2011-07-27T22:25:00.004+08:00

"Sometimes I wanna call you, but I know you won't be there.
Oh I'm sorry for blaming you, for everything I couldn't do.

Some days I feel broke inside, but I just won't admit.
Sometimes I just wanna hide, cuz it's you I miss.

If I had just one more day, I would tell you how much that I've missed you since you've been away."

---------------------------------------------------------------------
TODAY IS AN UNPRODUCTIVE DAY.
I GOTTA STOP THINKING, MAYBE FOREVER.
So tired these days just keep thinking & thinking wtf i wonder if you ever know how my heart aches so badly.

Just maybe.

2011-07-26T22:20:00.003+08:00

Ok, i guess i will be posting lesser since the night study everyday is tiring me out a lot.
anw this is gna be a repetitive cycle for the next 3 months of waking up, schooling, then studying till 830pm, coming home drained & just crash.
but for Os, it's gna be worth it so just keep going Jinglin.

it's been 16 weeks but yeah maybe it doesn't matter to you at all.
too tired to think of anything else so get out of my head. -.-

♚ What did you dream about in the last dream you can recall?
i dreamt of voldermort, with a nose.

91 more days till Os.
hell it's so scary just looking at the figures k wtf.

What does it take to hold you, when i'm here without you.

2011-07-20T19:01:00.001+08:00

And,

Just wanna know what's on your mind.

We're gonna give it a jumpstart.

2011-07-19T22:55:00.005+08:00

/Late update on Monte Carlo.

(Photo credits : Merilyn)

Haha i luv my girls super much Monte Carlo was good but the storyline was a lil predictable so yeah not v exciting or whatsoever.
Still had a really great time snapping loads of jumpshots & laughing over all of them cuz. spastic faces in mid air!! Hehe so thankful for em & my friends ok sudden realisation that life's good hmm. but wtv, I luv em!! (:

I think my mood swings have somewhat stabilised a lil, yes i'm immensely thankful that the nightmare's over. & I realised i'm pretty awkward. i'm not being dao kay i just dk how to. express myself in front of people f2f. -.-

WHAT.

Going to bed now with a mess of papers & piles of books on my bed.
Solution

Love how tumblr always has the appropriate words, pics, gif etc. for anything & everything.

♙ Would you rather relive your worst memory or face your biggest fear?
face my biggest fear.

So tired of tears.

2011-07-17T16:43:00.003+08:00

so i switched off my phone after nafa today till now, was feeling like a hell of a mess & i decided it was best not to talk to anybody. my back hurts & i'm feeling so annoyed & frustrated i don't mean to yell at my mom but i just felt so desperate to just go home and sleep. sorry mom.
maybe it's just major badass mood swings but i can't keep going on this way i've no idea why all i know is i gotta find myself back. no time to pay much attention to emotions. honestly just so tired of the shit i never seem to have a break from. yes i'm trying my best to look at positives but today is just not my day.

sometimes you have to wake up to the fact that nobody gives a shit about you so just suck it up & continue walking cuz nobody's gna be thr to get you back up on your feet but yourself.

there's math mock exam every monday starting tomorrow & honestly i'm dreading mondays more than ever.

i don't mean to be whiny you're prolly like "Walau complain so much for what sia forever emo like sai crazy." Ok everyone has their down moments mine's just a lil longer k.

times like this i wish i had lesser emotions.

If they only knew.

2011-07-15T21:47:00.003+08:00

2 things made my day today.

#1. Bball interclass!
awesome, & honestly i was kinda (pleasantly) surprised to see that all the 410 guys brought the purple class tee of last year haha! & Zhixiang Jiehao's warmup was hilarious okkk.

So proud of em!! 410 got into the semi-finals teehee! it was so tense just even watching em play but yeahhhh finals babeh. & honestly gotta specially thank 411 for cheering for 410 as well cus apparently the 4 of us 410 girls weren't loud enough & we couldn't stay throughout the matches. so whenever 410 scored, they would cheer tgt w us & vice versa it was funny!! can't thank em nuff. (:

#2. Nafa
had dinner with Murong she was lateeeeeee ok that woman it's ok i'm forgiving. idk we saw Chen Han Wei while eating at Bugis!!! Y'know that Channel 8 Actor Celebrity dingding HAHAHAHA.

but we could only see his backview zz.
she was going off about some random thing head fats HAHAHA & we laughed non stop k i love this girl.

Met Yuling & Sheryl, Minying came late! Ok had dance & idk why it's like my happy place i forget all the crap of the day & i really really love being w them so much.
So yep, i luv my girls loadzxc teehee. <3

----------------------------------------------------------------------

Chanced upon this on Tumblr & i thought it'd be just perfect.

the all in one room, seriously. i want HAHA.
i can dream forever lolol.

---------------------

have been thinking about the same thing these days, just keep haunting me at the back of my head & honestly i really wna know how you feel i don't wna guess or anyth cus i'm afraid to assume & everyth ok i should stop myself from thinking ok. ARGH.

♘ What are your biggest annoyances about people on blogs?
twit. idk maybe my blog's annoying to a certain extent too but twitting is my top most annoyance.

It's like learning to fly.

2011-07-13T19:52:00.003+08:00

kinda having one of the lousiest moods ever today idk for some reason i feel so frustrated until you wna explode & just break down to cry. all i wna do is just sleep & sleep cuz i honestly feel so drained and sleepy like literally all the time. it's like i can't find the zest or energy to hype myself up for another schooling day. idk what's going on but k this time will pass.
i gotta continue sleeping early & stop complaining.

but honestly i'm so tired & i need a hug.

♗ Where did your last bruise/cut come from?
when somebody threw the ball & hit my shin during CEP lesson when were playing some house game dingding.

You were waiting of the edge of the unknown.

2011-07-11T15:47:00.002+08:00

Short update today, while I have manymany posts about recent events.

1) Monte Carlo Movie Date with Merilyn, Yuting & Xuanlin on 30 June.
2) Transformers 3 with Amanda & Kityarn on 9 July.
3) Surprise Birthday Celebration on 10 July for Xuanlin with Amanda & Kityarn.

Will maybe post once the pictures are up!

-----------------------------------------------------------------

Prelim 1 results are a complete mess. I really didn't expect.. Ok i don't know but well i know much effort is needed. i've nothing to say about myself i just feel awful to see the tragic results. saying too much is nothing if you don't put them into actions, so i shan't say too much here.

I saw sth today that really really made my day i haven't seen it in a while now. kinda cute, i've no idea why i'm feeling this way either. it's like i feel so flustered to notice it and i was tugging at Amanda's shirt i had no idea why either. just so jumpy & heart was racing so fast.
hm, i wish you knew.

ahhh i kinda dk what to feel rn hm.

♖ If you could change five things about yourself physically, what would they be?

Er. Er. My backbone..? If that's counted physical. & nothing else! Cuz I know I was born this way for a reason & I shouldn't change anything about it!

Dear love,

2011-07-05T22:44:00.004+08:00

In our lives, people come and go as and when they like it. but who really does stay by you when you need them is what counts & you know for sure you would want to continue walking by these people who's never left your side.

ok thru this terrible prelims period i'm really v grateful for the people who've stayed by me. & honestly i can't thank this girl enough.

Merilyn. (: idk how to put it but she's always been there irregardless of the time or place, she'll always be there & to listen to any of my random craps or crazy mood swings. i don't know how to thank her enough but she's really been supporting me all the way, keeping me from falling apart & honestly i wouldn't be here today if it weren't for her. she's always finding little things in life to cheer me up by sending me endless encouragements & specially going down to take pictures of my favourite places just to cheer me up. the best thing about her is she never judges me & is never impatient with my never ending thoughts about everything. i honestly dk where i would be without her, she really means a lot to me & i love her so much. :')

Also, i'm equally thankful for this girl too.

Yuling. (: We both belong in 2 complete different schools & hardly meet up or whatsoever, but i know i can always count on her. we've been texting for a few years now & she's the first to know my problems & secrets. i remember telling her all my crushes since Sec 2 & she's been thru w my boyf problems, from the chase, the love & the heartache, she's always been there. i know that she'll always be just a phone call away, no matter what time it'd be. she's always on my side, she's like a sister to me & i won't know how to get by in life without her. she an amazing dance companion & the thing about her is that she never forgets you, & no matter what she'll always make time for you. just today i was feeling really crappy cuz i was thinking about sth & she got me to see her formspring, guess what i saw?

that really made my day & i wish i could just fly over right now & give her a tight hug like what she always does to me. i love you dearly Yuling. :')

----------------------------------------------------------------------------

Of course, it doesn't mean that if i don't specially thank you in my posts, you don't matter or what yeah? i'm also thankful for the people God has placed in my life.
My girlfriends in 410, really lovely and amazing bunch of girls who always are so enthusiastic & always there when i needed a listening ear or a hug.
My '95 brothers & sisters whom i haven't met for quite some time that never fail to make my day. i miss them so badly.
Nh friends, Nafa dancers, pri sch friends, the people whom i was once close to or the strangers that made an impact in my life.

i don't know how to really express my gratitude but whoever you are that is reading this, thank you for being part of my life in a way or another. i'm sorry i'm not good w words but i truly appreciate your presence.

i am going to bed right now with a thankful & happy heart.
I love you, each & everyone of you. (:

Blah.

2011-07-04T09:49:00.003+08:00

I'm currently laying in bed as I'm typing this. I'm supposed to be at Bishan rn watching the ASEAN Gymnas with Yuting, Yingpei & Yokekay but thanks to a terrible stomach ache I'm stuck lying at home now. I felt the air that i breathed in was cold & it chilled my windpipes zz i cant stand abdominal pain for nuts. This sucks my body's always acting up at the wrong time. I feel bad for ps-ing my girls & ok I love them soso much they're just the sweetest thing ever.

Yes it's finally gna be the last week of Prelims!!! Hope my paper one is able to pull up my overall subject grade to a.. Pass? Oh well just try my best la.

Now time to pop a pill & sleep it off, hope the pain goes away.

(/edit)
♕ Why do you love whom you love?
for all that they've been through & been there for me. for all the joy & moments spent together. for all the love & concern that they shower me with. for all the times spent together dancing singing eating ice cream or doing retarded stuff together. for making me feel so special. for everything & the little things they've done & brought into my life.

thankful!!

Hold me together.

2011-07-02T22:10:00.003+08:00

Oops I guess i've been a lil cranky & on the down side yesterday. today's almost the end of the second day of July & i've done 0 studying today. I don't know if it was the lack of motivation or whatever i'm just tired.

been on tumblr these days. all the pretty & relate-able quotes, pictures, gif never fail to make my day. & i've been receiving anonymous encouragement messages in my tumblr inbox, i'm so touched hehe. whoever you are thank you so much i truly appreciate em. :')

&&&&&&. Vans!!!

The second row's grey beside the purple & blue looks good.
hope to save up for them or sth!

just can't wait for Os to be overrrrrr. i can't believe it's gna be Prelim 2 7 weeks later after Prelim 1.
need to go back to my books soon.

die you.. argh.

♔ Why did you cry the last time you cried?
stressed. empty. tired. lonely. confused. frustrated. knowing things will never be the same again. hurt. missed someone like hell. sick of guessing. over thinking. insecure.
yup.

I wanted words but all i heard was nothing.

2011-07-01T20:26:00.005+08:00

Thank God for being with me for this week's Prelims. More to go next week!!
I'm feeling kinda empty right now, i've no idea why.
It's ASG today I wonder how are the dancers doing now.

Anyway after papers time was spent with Jingwen, Yuting, Yokekay, Yingpei.
Lunched then headed for ice cream, hehe nothing makes me happier than ice cream.
Lepaked at Burger King before Amanda, Xuanlin & Lionel came over & we started this insane Kartrider match on the iPhones, haha!
I love my bunch of sunshine they make me so happy.

------------------------------------------------------------------------

I'm feeling like really kinda awful right now like srsly with the tons of thoughts invading my mind these days. so tired & empty i don't even know where to start. there's this really heavy feeling in my heart & idk why i just can't get rid of it. maybe it's cuz of my lack of sleep or the endless cramming. i really hate this kinda so dead & stringent education system.
All work & no play makes jack a dull boy & this is the reason why we don't get geniuses like this in Singapore.

Cuz apparently we are not allowed the space to let our creative juices flow.
Discipline kills talent & creativity.

Ok this is getting much pretty of a rant post, maybe i'm just too frustrated by studying now. somebody take me away to places like

or just somewhere for a walk to cycle to dance to swim to play to do sports or whatever i don't care i'm so tired of everything i need to let it all out.

“They say I'm better off now, than i ever was with her.
As they take me to my local down the street,
I'm smiling but i'm trying dying not to drag my feet.

And my mates are all there tryin' to calm me down,
cuz i'm shouting your name all over town.
I'm swearing if I go there now, I can change your mind turn it all around.
I know that I'm drunk but I'll say the words,
and she'll listen this time even though they're slurred.
Dialed her number and confessed to her
I'm still in love but all i heard was nothing.”

2 years ago.

2011-06-29T20:33:00.003+08:00

Mymy how time flies, it's exactly 2 years since Asian Youth Games Opening Ceremony.
I honestly would go back & relive all those moments, even if it means the scalding parade square or ripping slacks on the rough burning floor etc.
I suppose that was the only time performing with NHDS felt like a family.

Ok enough of these sentimental thoughts about NHDS, but i miss being in thr so much hmm.
Screw prelims.
Fry my brain cells onlyyyyyyyy.

COME ON PRELIMS FASTER FINISH.

2011-06-24T21:24:00.001+08:00

Sucks studying during the holidays.
Too much cramming i guess!!
Prelims sorry if i don't do well man i tried.

Lol wth nonsensical posts these days. zz.

Worn

2011-06-23T00:51:00.002+08:00

Time check 1249.
Wlau so late alr 我要睡觉。sucks studying for prelims. I feel like k haven't studied this hard before man omg. But no matter how much I do I feel like I'm doing nth, like I don't feel accomplished yknow. Ugh.
Kk a few more days.

Hush hush.

2011-06-20T20:23:00.004+08:00

wow wow look at the amount of spider webs here lolol.

nothing much these days been studying my guts out everyday i'm so sick of it.
ugh ugh ugh ugh ugh ugh.
UGH.

i feel so cooped up at home, i wanna go out & exercise or sth but UGH.
sian until.
): i need my life back.
prelims are holiday thieves.

oh & i kinda gave up the 30 day challenge thingy cuz a lil sian. lol.
k & one last thing.
I think owls are scary.

Their eyes are so humongous staring at you like

I'm creeped.
maybe cuz after i watched Paranormal Activity 2 & it had sth to do with the owl, henceforth i got kinda scared of it? anw i think it's cuz of the eyes, the main thing.

Back to my books.

UGH.

):

Just one of those days.

2011-06-15T22:20:00.003+08:00

I badly need a hug right now, a long tight one.
feel so lonely these days.
no i don't mean to sound like some desperate for love person.

i just feel insecure.

I wish I could tie you up in my shoes
Make you feel unpretty too
I was told I was beautiful
But what does that mean to you
Look into the mirror who’s inside there
The one with the long hair
Same old me again today

My outsides are cool
My insides are blue
Everytime I think I’m through
It’s because of you
I’ve tried different ways
But it’s all the same
At the end of the day
I have myself to blame
I’m just trippin’

You can buy your hair if it won’t grow
You can fix your nose if he says so
You can buy all the make-up that M.A.C. can make
But if you can’t look inside you
Find out who am I to
Be in a position to make me feel so damn unpretty

I feel pretty
Oh so pretty
I feel pretty and witty and bright

Never insecure until I met you
Now I’m being stupid
I used to be so cute to me
Just a little bit skinny
Why do I look to all these things
To keep you happy
Maybe get rid of you
And then I’ll get back to me (hey)

My outsides look cool
My insides are blue
Everytime I think I’m through
It’s because of you
I’ve tried different ways
But it’s all the same
At the end of the day
I have myself to blame
Keep on trippin’

You can buy your hair if it won’t grow
You can fix your nose if he says so
You can buy all the make-up that M.A.C. can make
But if you can’t look inside you
Find out who am I to
Be in a position to make me feel so damn unpretty

I feel pretty
Oh so pretty
I feel pretty and witty and bright
And I pity
Any girl who isn't me tonight

Oh oh oh oh oh (Tonight)
Oh oh oh oh oh
Oh oh oh oh oh (Tonight)
Oh oh oh oh oh
Oh oh oh oh oh (Tonight)
Oh oh oh oh oh

I feel pretty (You can buy your hair if it won’t grow)
Oh so pretty (You can fix your nose if he says so)
I feel pretty and witty and bright (You can buy all the make-up that M.A.C. can make)
But if you can’t look inside you
Find out who am I to
Be in a position to make me feel so damn unpretty

I feel pretty
But unpretty

你.我.他.

2011-06-14T18:05:00.005+08:00

Happyhappy days.

I loved the Wedding Dress choreography & I got Yokekay to teach me hehe!

Decided to take a break from studying & came to upate this.
Anw nothing much these days just keep.
I also don't know what I was doing with my life, seems like a drag everyday.
I need to get a life.
----------------------------------------------------------------------

Went to Yuling's blog & I was reminded of the trip back to RJ which I forgot to blog about.
Anyway not much, went all the way there & we realised the General Office doesn't operate on Saturdays.
Ugh.
So we went to Long House for brunch & braved the storm lol to get to Zhangyi's house.
Had fun slacking thr, painting nails & talking & all.
It's amazing how much things we have in common man really.
Haha I miss them now!!!!

Photos taken from Yuling!!!!! ♥

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I WANT TO WATCH A MOVIE.
I haven't even watched Kungfu Panda 2 or Xmen First Class.
):

Oh I wna watch Mr Popper's Penguins too

WORD.

OH YES, & HEATHER MORRIS' DANCE IS HOT.

I thought she was Ke$ha for a moment.

2011-06-10T23:45:00.002+08:00

Just reached home from U.N.I Performance @ PA.
I think today's one of the happiest days of my life since 2011.
For some reason it just makes my day to see my 95 bro & sis again, though not everyone was there but it just lifted my spirits so much.

I love you guys.
I wish I could re-live today, I'm really happy!!!!

Proper update soon yup for now it's nightnight!
Going back to RJ w Yuling, Merlyn & Zhangyi tmr, dreading the journey there. ):

Goodnight!!!

No turning back.

2011-06-08T18:58:00.004+08:00

I'm so drained!!!!!

Woke up @ 615 for my DSA, I was really touched to receive "Good luck!!"s from my friends, thanks guys i love you all. :>
I trained to Marymount & it is torturous.
I hate morning train rides, plus it was so long. I got a shock eh!
I didn't know traveling on the Circle Line needed like 32 minutes from Dhoby Ghaut to Marymount I think. Sorry Yuling!!!!

The Auditions were tough & I feel completely demoralized cuz I'm the below average kid. The people were amazing & ah. Oh the seniors & fellow DSA-ers (? -.-) were friendly! Made new friends like Merlyn & Zhangyi hahaha.
O. My chances of getting in seem pretty slim. I kinda screwed up my solo piece in front of all the seniors & teachers. i was like

Oh well, whatever will be will be. (:

Washed up & had lunch with Merlyn, Zhangyi & Yuling. & it's really nice to see that there are people who share the same strong passion & joy as you - chinese dance. (: I really love their company. <3

Btw thanks xiong for everything, really appreciate it!!!

------------------------------------------------------------------

I'm kinda tired but i keep thinking lol as always.

THANKYOU READERS FOR TOLERATING MY WORDY POST. & for my frequent readers, if i even have any sia lol!
HERE'S A HEART FOR YOU.

Lol, Finn!!!

i'm secretly thankful for the happy memories you left me with, the ones you've prolly forgotten.
oh well.

You don't remember.

2011-06-06T18:25:00.003+08:00

Day 02 - The meaning behind your Blogger name.

I can't remember, i think i chose blindthelights.bs cuz it was kinda like a leaving the stage then the spotlights dim or something. I think I changed the url after the 岁月如歌 at CSTD competition. Kinda struck me that yeah soon enough i'll be leaving the stage sorta thing.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------

My back hurts today. & lol i think anybody hardly reads this space but well.
Kay good more privacy? Hahahaha.

1 more schooling day! Then i can get to roll around my bed in mornings knowing I have like 4 more hours in bed.

ISN'T THAT THE CUTEST THING YOU'VE EVER SEEN.

Speaking of cute, look at this little warbler.

HAHAHA. I don't fancy kids very much but there are exceptions.
& hey he dances & sings pretty well too.

But no kid can beat my favourite.

MAKE MY DAY.
------------------------------------------------

I never had the answer; Day 01 Challenge.

2011-06-03T19:53:00.006+08:00

I'm losing ideas on what to fill this place with. Hmm.

Anyway, just some random thoughts these days.
I feel I haven't been appreciating the people around me enough!!
Many people have been there for me & stuff but yeah I feel I haven't been showing them I love them enough.

Well, gotta show them you love & care for them right?
Or how'd they ever know?

Okay, gotta show more luvz. :>

---------------------------------------------------------------------

Chanced upon this 30 Day Challenge on Tumblr,
kinda different from the usual 30 ones but somewhat the same.
Shall start with

Day 01 - A recent picture of you and 15 interesting facts about yourself.

(Gonna be wordy from here on).

1) I do & love Chinese Dance, not really into Ballet cuz I think being on pointe's pretty scary.
2) I'm pretty straightforward & blunt at times, esp when I see something I don't like I'll voice out my opinions. Sorry if it kinda hurts sometimes.
3) I tend to overthink, a lot.
4) Criminal Psychology is what I wna major in the future. ;)
5) I can get pretty lazy sometimes.
6) I stick 'encouragement post-its' everywhere in my room to cheer myself on.
7) I am peeved by people who complain about every single thing in life. (Gonna rant a lil bit here). Come on is life really that bad that you've to emo 24/7. If things don't go your way then just get your ass & move on!!! No point brooding over it yah.
8) I believe in communication & no secrets to keep f/rships going.
9) I can't hide what I feel about someone from him/her for long. If I'm annoyed / upset w that person, I'll eventually tell him/her about it.
10) I prolly won't change for someone, unless you mean a lot to me.
11) I need pitch dark environment before I can fall asleep.
12) I'm awfully afraid to lose people I care about.
13) I can sleep through the night without changing positions, HAHA.
14) I love my friends lolll.
15) I love life, sure it gets sucky & there are days where I totally just wna give up on everything but I'll always make myself embrace the beauty of a certain aspect of life.

Anticipate day 02!!

I found this on Tumblr & I decided I should end off with a bible verse. (:

1 Thessalonians 5:16-18

Press on & keep going everyone. (:

Eye Candy

2011-05-29T20:19:00.004+08:00

Post of Sports Carnival will be up soon,
oh btw Fencing was the best sport ever done this year.

Okay recently I had some spare time on my hands & decided to watch Glee Season 2.
Yes I know I'm awfully slow but well, aiya.

I TELL YOU, THIS MAKES MY DAY.

Chord Overstreeeeeeet. ^^

AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.
HE HAS SIX PACS.

I'm honestly smiling to myself as I'm watching.

OMGGGGGG.

Okay idk what's with the penguin.
BUT STILL.
^^

It's not usual of me to go boy craze but reallyyyyyyyyyyyyyy.
Wai he sho cute.
Makes me happy x2109803473047523

------------------------------------------------

NJ Dance Audition's tomorrow.
Why did they only tell us like on Saturday when the auditions are on Monday?
Ugh.

All the best to those taking Chinese O Levels tomorrow!! (:

Take a bow.

2011-05-26T19:57:00.004+08:00

Remember these bunch of people?
The similar faces that used to stay by you guys during your times in dance?

Today's officially the day,
the S4s step down from NHDS. :')

For all the things that we've brought you guys through,

We hope those times were as memorable as it is to us.
Indeed, you guys may be quite difficult at times,
but I hope with the new exco in place, the juniors of NHDS will better cooperate with the leading batch to continue to soar.

Congratulations & all the best to the exco 2011!
Hope you guys, together with 96, will work hard to bring NHDS to greater heights.

:')

-----------------------------------------------------

Anw, English & HCL Prelims are over!!!
The HCL paper was sucha bitch, the essay topics are like

& paper 2 was super lengthy & the standard was crazily high.
LLF even said this was gonna be the standard of the O's HCL paper.

I have this constant bad feeling about Sports Carnival tomorrow eh!!!
Like something bad's gonna happen that's just gonna ruin my entire day.
Hmm, I'm kinda scared.
Kay, shall not put much thought into it.

Hey you.
if you're reading this & you're going through a bad time,
I just wanna tell you that.
You're gonna make it through, hang on a little while more.
Don't give up, have faith.
Things can only get better, don't let go.
(:

Where you truly belong.

2011-05-24T23:25:00.003+08:00

Short wordy update about my late night thoughts.

I MISS DANCE, NHDS.

I know since S3 I've been feeling pretty negative about the NHDS that was,
But the memories of NHDS is indeed unforgettable.

Come to think of it, I really miss running around in the hall like some siao gin nah before dance, perspiring in the sticky body suit & slacks, laughing with my brothers & sisters, jumping on people's back for a surprise piggyback, long & draggy warmups, laoshi's long talk, 睡觉时间, holiday practices, reaching back school in the wee hours of the night aft every late practice, running to the back of the canteen to buy food from the vendors whenever dance ended too late, walking back together when the sun has set.

Much much more memories but these are mainly what struck me most.
Sorry if my words doesn't make any sense cuz I'm tired & supposed to be sleeping now.
Plus it's so late alr!! brain isn't v active or wtv la.

English Prelim Paper 1 tomorrow, all the best to S4 taking the paper!! (:

Hai i miss u NHDS.

Cuz I'll be standing here strong.

2011-05-18T21:03:00.004+08:00

Had the happiest day of my life catching up with my girls yesterday.

I look like i haven't slept for days.
Whatever lollll.
Really love my babes, though it felt a lil incomplete cuz not the full force was present yesterday.
Nevertheless it was really nice to be catching up with them after so so so so so long & I've missed them all so much.
I'm really so happy to be able to catch up with them.
Love them all to tiny bits of Macnuggets. ♥

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Today went pretty smoothly.
Actually not much, PE was fantastic & i really enjoy playing frisbee & floorball with my girls.
Had double math periods, which is like 2h altogether.
& the constant integration differentiation, differentiation integration fried my brains.
Okay ya my mind's inflexible okaiiii got it.

HTH with Amanda & Xuanlin after school.
I felt so bad cuz I couldn't really understand what they were going through.
Cuz after all I've dumped away all sorts of emotional burdens.
Just sucks to see them so upset & trouble yet I can't do anything. ):
Sorry dears, but please know I love you guys & stay strong.

Was finding songs on Youtube & I chanced upon

Okay this is a pretty old song but I miss hearing it!!
I love all the little captions they put it around the people in the MV hahaha.
Made me fall in love with All Time Low all over again.

OHOH LOOK. :

AMAZING OR WHAT.
I want them all muahahaha.

Oh, I think I'm love with infinity signs after seeing

On Tumblr.

& won't it be nice if you got this for your wedding ring or something.

AWW. :')

It seems more applicable as a couple ring but who said you needed diamonds on your wedding rings!

Uh. K this is so random.
HAHAHA.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I know you don't care.
Oh well.

Do you know what if feels like?

2011-05-16T22:25:00.002+08:00

What do you do when
Life gives you a million reasons to doubt the faith that everyday would be a better day?

I'm tired.
But I try to hold on, even longer.

You say good morning, when it's midnight.

2011-05-15T19:35:00.004+08:00

Been mood swinging lately but thankfully it isn't that bad.
Just don't like coming home to get picked on every single thing I do, yup.

Went over to cousin's house yesterday to see my baby nephew!!!

Yes I don't dare to carry baby Milan alright, for obvious reasons.
I'm scared to yada yada.
Isn't Milan the cutest thing eva omg hahaha.

Skipped dance today cuz I wasn't feeling well, lack of rest.
Gna have to start sleeping early.
School starts tomorrow once again & it's back to lessons lessons.
Need to buck up already, though I know I'm a lazy ass & an awesome procrastinator.
Gotta force myself or I won't get anything done!!!

I have a huge craving for ice cream right now.

& I'M GNA TREAT WHOEVER'S WILLING TO BE MY ICE CREAM DATE.
HAHAHAHA, SERIOUSLY...............................................

NOPE!!!

I FEEL LIKE DANCING TONIGHT,
GONNA PARTY LIKE IT'S MY CIVIL RIGHT~

Looking forward to Tuesday!!!!!

My heart's so jet lagged.

2011-05-14T14:31:00.001+08:00

Been thinking of '95 more & more honestly.

SPEECH DAYYYYYYY. Finally.
I have no claims of any of the pictures so thankyou to Photographers Quah, Wong & Hor. (:

I really love the last picture, everyone's so mushed up together.

Looking forward to batch movie soonsoon. (:

Anyway, I feel happier these days.
Despite the occasional moodswings, I'm still doing fine.
No longer feeling very upset or whatever, cuz I'm flooded with the love from my friends.

Immensely thankful for the people around me who's always been there.
I'm not gonna like waste my time being upset over one thing when God's given me so much more that I can be grateful & thank Him for. (:

So, whoever's feeling down, cheer up & smile.
You're loved & blessed! (:

Black Star.

2011-05-10T17:40:00.004+08:00

Yes it was awesome.

I was kinda excited to see her ever since I got the tickets.
Went with Priscilla, Merilyn, Glenda, Amanda Low & Veronica.
Sorry no pix from me as usual cuz my laoyapok camera died.

Will edit this post once Merilyn / Amanda Low uploads the pictures!

I've been listening to her songs since her first album. & followed through her albums.
Except for the latest 'Goodbye Lullaby', which 2 songs I weren't exactly familiar with.

Her concert was reallyreally awesome, & she sang Sk8er Boi, Complicated, He Wasn't, My Happy Ending, Girlfriend, When You're Gone, Black Star, Wish You Were Here, Goodbye Lullaby, Stop Standing There etc.

But I was reallyreally surprised she sang Don't Tell Me.
Cuz recently when I was feeling down in the dumps I spammed this song.
& I was v happy x120984203987494875 when she sang this song!!!!

Had a crazy time screaming to all her songs & cheering.
I actually cried while she sang When You're Gone, dammit.
She's so pretty in real life & her Canadian accent was so sexy. HAHAHA.
All in all this concert was friggin' 100% worth it!!!
Avril please come for your second tour in Sg again!!!

Really miss those days where I'd just rush home everyday to listen to her songs.
I'm falling in love w her all over again hehe.
Avril Lavigne. ♥ :D

-----------------------------------------------------

I'm feeling really unstable these days.
But it still touches my heart to see random acts of kindness.
Today an old lady motioned me to sit beside her, like among the other people who boarded the bus.
Okay it's small but I really appreciate it hehe.

Gna spend time on things that are actually worth my time.
Getting really annoyed with my new com system, haven't got the time to set up my stuff yet argh.

“There's a girl, that gives a shit behind this wall.
You just walked through it.”

Hey sunshine.

2011-05-09T11:35:00.002+08:00

Was on FB this morning & 102948475 thanks to Ying for uploading these pictures!!
Cuz I smiled when I saw them.
I miss my '95. ):

Still trying to make everything seem alright.

2011-05-04T22:10:00.003+08:00

I try to make it seem all better but somehow when I reach home,
my walls of pretense just fell through & i just wna lay in bed to sleep.
Also, there's this feeling like you keep wanting to listen to the song, even though you know it upsets you.
Didn't know it'll hurt this bad, even till now.

Anw yay my lappy's back after I sent it for repair.
Screw bloody viruses. They reformatted everything & upgraded my system to Vista.
Thumbs up for that but I'm still currently trying to figure things out.
So everything's in a mess.
& yeah, Speech Day post will be delayed again sorry!!

Honestly i need more money.
FOR FOOD.
& I haven't been going to my favourite ice cream cafe despite my foul mood these days.
I miss my Daily Scoops break! ):

So messed up.

Oh on a sidenote, I wna

after Os!!!

Okay but duh, study > everything for naoz.

'95, Forever

2011-05-01T14:48:00.003+08:00

Not any proper updates for now because not all the pictures are up yet.
Speech Day with my dearest 95,
was our last performance to conclude our journey in NHDS.

After coming home from Speech Day & washing up,
I cried like mad on my pillow.
& I saw the spam of emo tweets by my sisters.
& it just made me cry even harder.
I really just can't believe everything's over.

Just a simple update for today,
will promise to do a proper one soon. (:

-----------------------------------------------------

Was on Tumblr & it made my day with all the pretty pictures.

I'd smile forever to see this.

& there were some I could relate to. Hmm.

(Part of) Worst feelings in the world...

Having to look at the face of the person you love, knowing they won’t love you:

The feeling of being forgot, unwanted, not good enough:

Yeah, I figured that nobody's gonna treat me right if I don't start loving myself first.
& that it's pointless, I keep wasting myself away with all these sadness.
It's unfair for me, so what for keep flooding myself with the unhappiness that I put upon myself?
I am strong, & I'm sure I can make it through. (:
Thanks Tanji. (:

Have you ever had a dream that felt so real?

2011-04-28T17:50:00.003+08:00

Had one of the worst mornings today.
Keep waking up in between my sleep last night & my mind would be spinning whenever i opened my eyes.
Felt so terrible when I woke up at 6am today, so I went back to sleep till 7.

& once again, I woke up after a dream that made my heart sink all the way to the bottom of my bed.
It felt so real, yet during the dream I dreamt I could actually just pull it off with a shrug.
But when i woke up.
My mood was ruined, entirely.

It cheered me up though to walk to school with 95. Ever so thankful for my bunch of sunshine.
(:
BBFC & autographs on purple balloon! (:

Ah, life's been pretty mundane and empty these days.
& during English today we're supposed to do our essay plan about Dreams.
To help us gain inspiration, Ms Koh made us think about our happy place.
Yeah instantly, I thought of

I'm really thankful to be able to dance.
Amongst these happy thoughts of dancing my heart out at NAFA,
suddenly these pictures, scenes rather, flashed across my mind.

Then I realised why I suddenly thought of my 95.
Tomorrow will be our last dance.
Before we've to permanently step down from the stage of NHDS, with nothing left but memories.
It's all too fast.. );

Honestly I don't dare to imagine where will everyone go after leaving NHDS.
Like. I miss my brothers & sisters so dam bad.
Can we, don't go?
--------------------------------------------------------

No doubt, I thought of you.

Everything might just end up in vain.

2011-04-23T21:38:00.003+08:00

Alright, there won't be any proper updates for now cuz apparently my lappy's dead & I can't do anything about it.
Sian die me hurhur.
So sorry readers, a wordy update for today!!

Anw, yesterday had a study date with Shirlyn at Fushion & I really missed her alot.
We're gna grow up & work together!!
I'm her Criminal Psychologist & she's my Superintendent!
Had dinner with her & Fenny @ Clementi Mos.
I'm thankful for them.

Today was 95's Speech Day practice!
Was really hyped cuz I realised I haven't been spending time with 95 as a whole cuz of SYF & everything.
It's really good t dance w my loves again!!!
The random shuffling, spam of eye candy, bimbo dance, taupok, camo app, dragging, jumpshots, budget lunches, bubble orange.
Most importantly, is dancing on stage with everyone. (:
Little memories that mean so much. (:
Boo omg I think I'm gna miss 95 like shiz when I graduate. ):

Mm, just backed up my phone's memory into my Memory Card, trading it in tmr.
Kinda happy that I'm finally getting a new phone, a little sad that. Er ya.
But well, I hope I can leave behind what I wna put down in my phone so when I trade it in tmr, it'll leave me.

Excited for my new phone tmr!! (:
Gna go back to my book or notes nao.

To those who actually took the time t read all these, thank you yo.
;D

The climb's wearing me out.

2011-04-17T23:59:00.004+08:00

Time Check's Twelve AM.

Yeah what am I doing up at this unearthly hour right.

So many things on my mind right now.

Just some late night thoughts, it sucks to think how much everything has changed.

I'm happy, yes I am. But I can never truly deny the hole in my heart.

& at anytime at all the memories just overwhelm me and.

That's when I just break.

But I'm so tired of feeling this way, you know?

Hahaha, goodnight.

Mending a broken heart.

2011-04-16T18:44:00.002+08:00

Had a really great time catching up with Primary school mates at Fairfield's Carousel Night yesterday.
Rushed there after dance thankyou so much Shirlyn for waiting for me & Szeting, Clarabelle & Yuanfang for waiting for me to arrive before eating!!

Saw many people which i was uncertain whether I've seen them before hahaha.
Didn't take much pictures though. ):

Anw I'm sick this morning.
I slept for a total of 15 hours today, kinda pig hur. Guess I haven't been getting my sleep these days.
Blood pressure dropped & I've been feeling so dizzy zz.
Had a sudden terrible flu since Math lesson ytd, I totally screwed my Curves & Circles test. ):

Went to dance & we had to redo the gunny sacks as it was too heavy.
LOOK AT THE PILES & MESS OF NEWSPAPERS.

The gunnysacks were so dam dusty.
& I was one of the people who sewed them up after stuffing.
Imagine a distance of what, sack of dust 10cm near to your nose.
& I had to stay so near it while trying to find a clear pathway to poke my pin through.
Urghhhhhhh.
Glad that was over, but anw idk somehow seeing the Cultural Group dance cheers me up. (:

------------------------------------------------------------------

Evolution; I'm forced to leave behind.

2011-04-05T17:36:00.007+08:00

Sorry aye, it's been so long since I last posted.
Anw SYF was such a breathtaking experience!
It's really lovely to receive well wishes from the NH family & Cultural dancers.
It's so encouraging to see so many people coming down to UCC to watch our performance, 3 rows filled w NH people!!

Just some lump pictures through the last few days of practice all the way to SYF.
All photo credits to Joanna, Huiyi & Yingying!
I miss everything nowwwwwww.

The Story : Evolution.

Costumes

My Sec 4 Modern Dancers. (:
Sumpah the Cultural dancers are the sweetest thing on earth, they made this scrapbook for each of the Modern dancer. Inside were the pictures of mainly the specific people during dance, plus they wrote encouraging notes inside. Touched us like. :')
Mine was done by Tong & yay she got yellow for my scrapbook, love you babe. (:

Back at the studio..

Looking back now, it's all so fast.
Really, though some guys were total asses during practices but I'm so glad we all made it through together.
NHDS Modern Dance 2011, Our Miracle. (:

All the memories felt just like it was yesterday.
Haha the most memorable one was hiding in the studio in total darkness doing the canes w some of the Modern upper secs.
HAHA dumb things we did hmm.
I miss everyth oh no. ):

----------------------------------------------------

Things change, people come and go.
I guess if people were really meant to be, they'll be.
If it's meant to be yours, it'll always be yours & will always find a way back to you.
As we grow up we realise holding on is not gonna work everytime, that's why we're taught to let go.
We chase happiness, but sometimes we just need to let go to be happy. Or at least, just see him happy.
I guess I'm forced to grow stronger, the hard way.
Don't know how long I'll take, don't know how much this emptiness is gna eat me away.
But I guess I'm gna give myself more time.

I miss you.

In less than 24 hours' time.

2011-03-27T15:43:00.004+08:00

It's TOMORROW.

The day we've practiced so hard for, cried so hard for, hurt so much for, perspired so much for.
Please don't let our memories, hardwork and everything go down for waste.

NHDS Modern Dance, we'll make our own miracle.
Press on till the end guys, please.
We can do it.

P.S/ I still care.

What else can we leave behind?

2011-03-24T19:36:00.005+08:00

Yvonne took this small stack of photos to Geography class today.

(Taken from Yvonne's FB).

A few pictures like these could bring back so many memories.
It's up on the Dance noticeboard btw.

I don't know what to say.
Tomorrow's the last day of Modern 95's time in dance, or so to speak.
It's so unfair we don't even know whether we get to dance Speech Day 2011.

Praying & hoping the last practice for SYF tomorrow will be fruitful.

4 more days to SYF.

My heart thumps whenever I see the words.
& I get so scared just thinking about it.

“It's not over tonight, just give me one more chance to make it right.
I may not make it through the night, I won't go home without you.”

You.

2011-03-19T13:56:00.002+08:00

from Tumblr.

(;

It's no time to waver and bend.

2011-03-16T13:36:00.003+08:00

12 days away from Modern Dance SYF.

I'm really scared.
Practice was good yesterday, in the actions wise.
In terms of emotions I guess we're still lacking a bit here & there.
I'm still kinda glad we managed the 3 full-up rounds w/o failing. (:

Had some concert thing again ytd, don't know why some people don't understand the meaning of "Any form of photography or videoing is strictly prohibited."
Too bad you don't get to watch our whole dance.

Had some positive feedbacks about our dance but I suppose we all know inside that we prolly didn't do our very best.
Idk la, I'm just so scared you know. ):

I've no mood for school or anything in my mind's all SYF.

):

-----------------------------------------------------

Okay on a sidenote,

LOL yay.

You know we're gonna make it through.

2011-03-14T20:21:00.005+08:00

Tired, blistered feet, sweaty palms, sticky necks and arms.

But totally worth it.

The concert part was idk, haha bluffed my way through.

The practice turned out more productive than expected.
& I'm really so happy everyone managed to full up the final time w/o failing!! (:
Everyone was really worn out by that time, but everything felt worth it.
It was so comforting to see the satisfaction & happiness on everyone's faces.
It was even more worthwhile to see laoshi, smiling. (:

PRESS ON MODERN!! (:

Had dinner with baby after dance, the perfect way to end my day. (:
Get well soon alright!

After bathing, washing my clothes, sewing that big nasty hole in my slacks,
it's time for me to

HAHA nights!!

Youer than you.

2011-03-13T15:03:00.002+08:00

I think I've issues with inferiority or something.

Nevermind that.

Aesthetics Camp tmr!!
Alright I don't get the point of it but I heard it was to encourage us for SYF?
I don't know but for me i think it's pretty unnecessary.
But nevertheless we gotta be thankful for that, got it.

I wna go cycling!!!
Or walk at somewhere w a lot of greenery.
But Tumblr's good, keeps me entertained when I'm home w nothing to do.

You got amazing things like

& definitely sentimental facts like

Holding hands may seem like an innocent gesture, but they show more than a simple interlocking of fingers. Your hands are one of the most essential parts of your body: you build with them, feed with them, hold with them, touch with them, fight with them; they are the tools of the human body. To take a hold of another’s hand is to break from living individually. It is to link yourself to another being, to momentarily entwine your life with another’s, to promise, for a moment, that you need not face the world alone. More simple, more aesthetically naive than other forms of affection, i.e kissing, hugging, sexing.., the act of holding hands is often trivialized in its true implications. As the Beatles once said” all I want to do is hold your hand .”

(via paulinajnt, littlemissyan)

Haha luvluv Tumblr.

Okay, for some reason I was looking forward to today since yesterday.
Don't really know why, maybe cuz today's the thirteenth? (:

& a link in Youtube redirected me to

Made my day. (:

These things I'll never say.

2011-03-12T16:39:00.003+08:00

#prayforjapan

Photo credits : Geardiary.com

):

& whoa, since when has Google's keyword search become so efficient?

All it takes is efforts from everyone.

2011-03-11T23:44:00.004+08:00

Just 17 more days.
I don't want to leave with regrets.
I don't want to waste anymore time crying & evading.
I don't wanna just wait for a miracle, waiting is useless if you don't take any damned actions.
& nobody's gna help us if we don't start helping ourselves.

I just want to make things right again.
Sorry I haven't been trying hard enough.

I'm so scared.

I don't know just what to do.

2011-03-05T13:54:00.004+08:00

SYF's draining. Mentally & Physically.
Rehearsal's on Tuesday already.
& we're barely hanging onto a Bronze.

I'm so afraid to make laoshi angry again.

I need a break.

Sorry about the sad posts these days.
So many things weighing down in my head.

And so I'm left, short of breath
With that heavy feeling in my chest
Baby I'm so crushed

So I told myself that tomorrow's gonna be the day
And I keep on telling myself that I'm gonna find a way
And I wont be afraid just like yesterday
Wont walk away never gonna let another chance slip away
-Crushed, Rosette.

You know why sometimes people get upset over the things we think it's negligible?
#1. They purely just can't get over it.
#2. The things just mean a lot more to them than it ever was to you,
so much more than you'll ever know.

Every little thing you do.

2011-02-28T20:43:00.002+08:00

Anybody wants to join me?

All's fine now, just tackling Common Tests.
Still feel dam tired these days, wna sleep so bad. ):
And HAHA i'm kinda embarrassed by myself sometimes cuz I'm a total flip and some insane kid that goes around laughing and yelling so loudly around school.
I don't feel like a sixteen year old!!
Plus I look so puny.

It's okay it'll all be alright & fine!
I'm reallyreally thankful everything worked out b/w me & bb.
Rawrrrrrrr. (:

Studied History in school w bb today.
Good thing it was productive cuz i totally crashed when I got home.
But anw, jiayou peeps!

My life's so boring. ):

">

Not. ;)

I don't wanna run away anymore.

2011-02-24T22:40:00.003+08:00

Things have been bad.
Till the extent that I've been having terrible nightmares of bleeding, being lost, all alone, trapped and stuff.
Such nightmares continued for consecutively 4 days and I wake up every morning feeling so..
Wrong.
So afraid and vulnerable i just dk how to start my day right anymore.

SYF's really tough and I can tell that laoshi's losing patience with us.
I just don't see why some people just don't have the sense of urgency.
But whatever, all i know is that i have to hang on to the end of this period.

I haven't been concentrating well in class, I couldn't think well.
I'm not in the right mental and physical state of mind and I really don't mean to nua in class.
I know my results are like complete shit yet I'm prolly not trying hard enough to push it up.
But, I'm trying.

I don't really tell anyone how I feel these days cuz I feel that I'm a burden.
& I've been welling everything up inside that I'm breaking down almost every night now and then.
I'm trying my best to hold onto everything.

My greatest concern is still my back.
Everything's screwed, everything hurts. Couldn't breathe well.

I need a break sometime.
& I need you.

Tough times don't last, only tough people do.
I'm also tired of keeping everything inside.
I'll take it slow, just hang on and be strong especially this period of time.
Once everything's over, I will slowly work on my studies.

Meanwhile,
I will be strong.
Cuz everything will be okay.
& we're gonna make it through.

Twice, thrice, four times a night it's true.

2011-02-17T20:49:00.008+08:00

Uh.

I've been pretty lazy and reluctant to update this space these days.
I think hardly anybody comes and reads this anw.

SYF's next month.
Like honestly, I didn't think things would be this fast and that our journey in NHDS would be concluded with such a major competition.
I'm scared.
So worried about so many things.
But mainly, SYF.
But nah, shall stop saying how afraid I am of SYF.
Things come and we just have to do our best for it.

Realised I've been enjoying my NAFA Sundays more now.
The new dances are so pretty. (:
& I'm looking forward to them every Saturday night hehe.

Anw, HAHA so random but still.

BABY FREEZE YOZ.
LOL wtheck, noobie i know k!!!
But i so long nv do alr lolllll give chance!

&, I miss these days. ):

Yes I was studying.
All photo credits to my anorexic partner. ♥.

Rawr i miss you too bb. ):

Somewhere in the world tonight, someone's falling in love for the first time

2011-02-14T21:19:00.002+08:00

Happy Valentine's Day!!

How was your day?

Thankyou everyone who's given me cards and candies, I really appreciate them kay.
Thankyou super much! (:

I know Valentine's Day is meant to be spent going out with boyfriends or girlfriends.
Receiving roses and huge teddy bears and stuff.
But I had my best Valentine's today.
Simple day, simple things we did.
Sentimental gifts mean more to me than store bought stuff.
It simply just shows someone cared enough to sit down to make the gift.
Thankyou so much baby. (:

Somewhere in the world tonight,
everything's alright.

Blessed Sixteenth. (:

2011-02-08T19:03:00.003+08:00

Thank you, with all my heart.

Thank you to everyone who has made this day special for me. (:

Thank you for the texts that showed that I actually mattered to you guys who texted me.
Thank you for all the well wishes on Facebook.
Thank you for the wishes you guys say to me whenever you pass by me in school.
Thank you for the singing of the birthday songs & "I LOVE YOU JINGLIN"s.
Thank you for the presents, notes, cards and every little effort made to give me a gift.
Thank you for the cake smashing, it really made my sixteenth birthday memorable.
Thank you for the time spent to accompany me to just sit down and eat with me.

I'm thankful for friends.
I'm thankful for my boyfriend.
I'm thankful for everything around me, everything God has given me that makes me a lucky person to be living in his blessings.

You're still in my mind and heart.