My last cca extravaganza with nhds.

it was a chore to smile during the performance.
it felt fucking fake.

until we came to studio, started dancing to the music we played when they were still here.
i felt the gush, smiles, happiness flood to me. i automatically full-up.
i returned to the times nhds was my everything, my family, my escape from unhappiness.
to the times when i felt brotherhood & sisterhood.
to the times when i can safely assure myself "it's okay, there's always nhds there for me"

i looked at the ayg costume, stared at it. memories invaded my head.
kityarn : memories right.
me : yeah.

then i looked at you all.
i just want to leave, & never ever ever look back.